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    Morrigan

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Popular Content

Showing content with the highest reputation since 01/26/2020 in all areas

  1. Having been a part of several writing communities for more than half my life, I think I've finally got a pretty good grip on what makes an enrapturing roleplay experience. The people I have met in the PS community have introduced me to a largely plot-free play style - and that has honestly changed this hobby for me for the better. The writers here consistently supply immense inspiration and compelling characters and stories, and half the time none of us have any idea how a thread is going to end, and I freakin' love that. On top of having extremely rich and vivid in-character happenings, the OOC community is absolutely the kindest, funniest, most thoughtful group of people I have ever met, online and otherwise. The folks here communicate openly and lovingly, are inclusive and engaging, and I have learned a whoooole lot - about writing and real life situations in general - from a lot of them. Here's to PS being around for a long time to come. 💖
    10 points
  2. If the member in question is an active contributor to the site and has not broken any rules, then the issue seems to lie with co-admin's immaturity: Unwillingness to talk it over with member (even thru a mediator) Anger issues (vibes that other members will eventually pick up on) Causing division (putting you in a ME or THEM situation and forcing you to take sides) Bottom line is, it's difficult enough when a member causes problems on a site, but do you really want an admin on your site that behaves this way? Eventually It'll cause you to be the only two people on the site.
    9 points
  3. It sounds like you're mortified, and rightfully so. That is not well-meaning behavior. That does not sound like a simple misunderstanding. That sounds like someone who knows they're in the wrong and wants to divert attention from their wrongdoing onto making any who question them seem like questioning them is the wrongdoing instead. Yikes. So. We forbid graphic depictions of rape on our board because 1. we've been on boards that don't, and the no-holds-barred approach can attract people like the person you're struggling with right now, and 2. in our collective opinions, life's too short for surprise! 'sexy' rape scenes. And regardless of real life experiences, rape is one of those sensitive subjects that people should be able to engage with on their own terms. It sounds like they are taking advantage of your fantasy that they are a reasonable person. It sounds like your players have seen that before you - and I hope that you soon can see that, too. I too have faltered on enforcing my boundaries. I too have wondered if I just hadn't communicated clearly enough, rather than deal with the more unsettling reality of someone deliberately misinterpreting what I've stated I'm comfortable with. In the fantasy where I merely failed to use the right combination of words to unlock their understanding, this person was innocent and I could avoid future 'misunderstandings' by getting it right. In this fantasy, I had the power to change the outcome with reasonable behavior. But that was all it was: a fantasy. Reasonable conclusions depend on both parties being reasonable, and this person has already proven they're not willing to be that in this situation by throwing a fit over a perfectly standard thing (IE "hey, could you maybe not with the non-consent?"). Maybe they are reasonable in other situations ... but personally, I've tried enough with people who weren't that I hope I'd err on the assumption that someone like this is not, indeed, going to suddenly be reasonable on other things. There's some subjects I wouldn't take this hard a line about, but sexual boundary violations tend to be one of the most blatant red flags for major entitlement issues down the line. From personal experience: yes, they're going to be mad if you don't keep giving them what they want at your expense. And no, appeasing them is not in fact worth it in the long run. If they were reasonable, I suspect they would be talking with you about this rather than around and at you.
    9 points
  4. Since my mother passed on Easter, it's been harder and harder to keep up creative pursuits. I've worked so hard on my groups I don't want to let them dwindle though. She wouldn't have wanted that. I just wish the numbness wasn't wearing off and making me feel like I'm suffocating.
    8 points
  5. 8 points
  6. I'm sure you've been seeing a lot of changes, and fixes and more going through and I'm sure you're curious! I'm going to give you a few updates and changes to things that we have changed/added.
    8 points
  7. For anyone that needs to hear this: That person stealing your site concepts, wording, features, and/or general layout concepts, but then changing things up just enough to where they can't be pegged for copyright infringement -- you're better than them. They can take your concepts and steal your shit all they want, but at the end of the day, shitty sites don't get stolen from. The fact that you're the one they chose means you were something they looked up to. Your ideas were good ideas, your structure was good structure, your site was a good site. It's a shitty way to say "hey, you guys are my role models," but hey. You're special to them. But you know what they can't steal? Good staff. They can take your stuff all they want, but if they don't know how to be good staff, it will fall apart right under their noses. And if they're taking your stuff to be vindictive or toxic, then their sites will 100% fall apart. They might have a good 6-month run, but if they're toxic and love to have and start drama, no one is going to stick around for that - I promise you. So, if this is something that's happening to you, be the bigger person and ignore it. Block them if you can, and keep being the best staff you can be, treat your members with respect, and don't let biters like them get you down. Have a great day!
    7 points
  8. As most of you have noticed I've been MIA for about a year. Here is why.
    7 points
  9. Still in shock that I got 91% on my Musical Theatre Exam. What. I was sure I'd failed 😅
    7 points
  10. It’s not a problem to make mistakes. It’s not a problem not to know things. It’s a problem to make excuses, blame it on other people, cover it up, get angry about it, or pretend it never happened.
    7 points
  11. In order to be a writer, one must be both sadist, and masochist.
    7 points
  12. This place. I'd gotten out of the RP game a couple years back after a decade and a half or so of it being my primary hobby. Just diminishing returns, souring relationships, egos and mess. I meandered into Passing Strange a good few months ago because I'd known one of the staff for a long while and missed regular engagement with them. We neither of us are great at maintaining contact, so I thought this would help. And my goodness. These people. They are good writers, sure. Threads are engaging and unpredictable and I like that we have a sort of melting pot of styles. Some posts are appropriately pithy and brief, evoking only the attitude of the established character and being excellent little reaction snapshots, while others are replete with visceral imagery that absolutely paints a picture. It all runs the spectrum and serves to drive stories forward in fun and fascinating ways. But whatever, a lot of places have stellar writing. That's not why I love these people. Statistically I have to accept that you probably could, but I still catch myself doubting anyone will ever find a kinder, healthier community of humble humans just trying to have a little fun and make each other's lives better. The staff are across the board gentle and welcoming, hilarious and proactive. They embrace their role as facilitators and accept their fallibility, always open to suggestions and changes. They very sincerely want this place to be safe and gracious to all comers, and the memberbase embraces this fully. I was not a month in before this community felt very much like the place I belong. Compassion runs rampant, and while we of course have occasional conflict because that's how human interaction works, the overwhelming desire to respond with understanding and find workable solutions keeps the community strong. If the setting intrigues you, stop on in. Passing Strange is a wonderful home and if you decide to settle in, I think you'll find yourself loving it for a long, long time.
    7 points
  13. I do not think I could find a better community of kind, caring, hilarious, talented people anywhere on the internet. The stories and characters that these individuals create are some of the most enriching literature I've ever read. I cannot be more happy to be a part of a community that is made up solely of genuine people that are genuinely here to have fun and make one another happy. The admin team is small but mighty, always open to community discussion and disagreement without making it into a bigger deal than it ever has to be. We're all just a bunch of nerds that like to roleplay and be silly, and it shows in every part of the site as a whole.
    7 points
  14. Players that don’t play with others? Like it’s fine you want to write with me but please please try playing with other members too! It fuels my anxiety when I see people lurking online and waiting for me to post when I’m not in the mood to post. It’s a red flag because it feels like they don’t want to actually rp. Have you ever noticed that when an admin takes a much deserved break, the site goes quiet until they come back? Why, though? It reminds me of class when the teacher is late and nobody does anything until they show up. It’s perfectly okay to also take breaks but I don’t understand why player to player interaction isn’t a thing. 😔
    7 points
  15. Hey there. I'm new, still checking things out. Trying to shake some rust off and have some fun.
    6 points
  16. I care more about what the post is giving me that I can respond to. If one word is enough, then one word is enough. No, it's not the norm. You know what is? Post splicing, a thing I hate. I try my utmost to avoid it even when the reply I'm given does it. I don't specify word counts in my guidebook, I mention it in our ad but that's it. I understand why one might want an idea of what the expectations are, but honestly if an admin says 'no word count' then gets mad at you for whatever length you've chosen, that's on them.
    6 points
  17. This place is undeniably home. It is filled with familiar, welcoming faces and even if you're new you very quickly fall into the familiar heartbeat of Passing Strange. Everyone is always interested what everyone else is up to. The sense of community is undeniable. Not to mention that there is always something compelling to either read or be involved in. Everyone here is a wonderful writer who constantly goes above and beyond. Each character seems to be crafted with the utmost care. Each post, no matter how short or long, leaves you wanting more. I feel incredibly lucky to be a part of this community.
    6 points
  18. I love this place. The people, the admins, the atmosphere. It's welcoming to everyone who comes in. Everyone is always willing to talk and joke or just be there if you need an ear as well. The Roleplay side of things is pretty spectacular as well. You never know what is going to happen, theres a plot twist in almost every thread and they're always fun! Some are intense and others are silly. Just depends. I'd 10 outta 10 recommend this place to anyone looking for a great people environment as well as a place to watch your characters grow and thrive (or yah know kick the bucket sometimes lol) and just see what happens. I love this place, its my Rp home.
    6 points
  19. If you didn't experience the 90's you don't exist to me. I'm done with this getting older shit.
    6 points
  20. The short version: I see no issue with it provided they were celebs in the first place, and not just a random picture you found and liked. Most communities do have rules against the latter though, for obvious reasons. Food for thought: If your community does ban the use of deceased PBs, how do you handle it when a long-used face passes away?
    6 points
  21. Yeah, sounds like you do need to be blocking someone, just not this person. So, why are you giving these people a platform to bully someone like this and get away with it? This is some straight up ninth grade bs and we don't enable this crap. We don't punish someone for the actions of someone else. If I was on your site, and I saw and knew you did sthn like this, I would be straight up gone af. I have stalkers. I have ppl that don't like me. I can't control them, I can only control me, and if you're going to judge me on the behavior of someone else, you don't deserve me. If you do it to one person, you're likely going to do it to someone else and I'm not with that. Yes, your players and their safe space to rp are important. But guess what, the moment this person joined, they became one of your players. They deserve a safe space where they can enjoy a site too. If they do the same thing they're accused of doing, deal with it then. It's possible they don't know it's bad or why. But this? This is just... I also don't block people on other people's experiences. I may block someone across all the sites I run for five years, but it'll be bc of a serious infraction in my presence. P.S. bad pr is still pr. And I say this as an admin that's had to weather a site being attacked before.
    6 points
  22. I think people neglect to notice that all character interaction is a relationship. Good, bad, neutral or otherwise. Dating/romance is not the only type of relationship that a person can have. I have acquaintance relationships with my coworkers. I have friendships with my... friends. I have professional relationships with my bosses. I have a loving relationship with my kids. I have romantic and sexual relationship with my boyfriend. I also create superficial relationships with random people in shops for a few minutes. People can despise one another and have a rivalry relationship. When you interact with other humans you are forming a relationship with them. The problem is that people put too much weight on romance being the driving factor for their character. While humans in general are sexual beings (I mean we do think about sex a lot) it doesn't mean that sex is the only purpose to having a relationship. In fact this is why I pre-ship my characters with existing romantic relationships with players that I trust, even if they aren't on the site that I've joined, so when that the focus won't be on establishing a romantic relationship when I encounter other players characters. It gives a more story oriented reason to connect with people. So at the end of the day I think relationships might be MORE important but not necessarily the "romantic" sort that everyone thinks of by default.
    6 points
  23. Found a dog friendly air bnb with open reservation. Having heat, clean laundry, and a hot shower for the first time in a week is amazing.
    6 points
  24. I personally think that Discord (and other chat-based RPGs) are worse than forum-based RPGs. For me it comes down to the fact that I don't really like rapid-fire roleplaying which almost becomes a necessity in Discord-based RPGs, especially if there are multiple people involved (thus the risk of getting lost). I like to put thought into my responses, to put thought into building my characters, to write long-form posts that are paragraphs in length, and other such things that allow me to get lost in a story and also to have both open and closed threads. The things that I want out of an RPG are not compatible with the chat-based RPG format.
    6 points
  25. I have been RPing a long, long time. Almost two decades. I've gone through many sites. I've picked up many friends along the way. I've been an admin more times than is probably really reasonable, actually. But I have to say, after being through the wringer, deciding what sorts of people I like, what sorts of RP I like, and how I want my home to look... this is the place. After this, I really don't think anywhere else will suffice. Out of character, the community is warm, supportive, always aiming to make sure interactions are healthy ones where everyone is treated as a person with feelings and lives of their own. It's not always perfect, but when conflict does arise, there's always that goal of making sure it gets solved with communication. I value this online as much as I do in the "real" world. And don't even get me started on the site itself. It was built with love, and is always open to changing what it needs to change in order to make sure the site runs as desired. RP is meant to be FUN and that's the goal here, making it stressful would defeat the whole purpose. Every day sees over a hundred posts, typically even on the slowest days, and plots are almost always hot. Being able to jump in wherever and whenever and keeping things organic means no one gets left behind or left out, and the community's respect of other players means bulldozing isn't an issue, either. I think about my characters here, and the characters of others, almost all day every day. The writing is top notch, the characters are varied and often hilarious, and really I wouldn't trade Passing Strange for anything. Twenty years and I have never felt more welcome, more creative, or more proud being in a forum. If you want to play a wereanimal of some sort, or a vampire, or a magic human, or even just a very normal human stuck in a world with all of these crazies... you gotta at least try this.
    6 points
  26. I have said this before and I’ll say it again, Passing Strange gives me the opportunity to read from all of my favourite authors in the one place. Everyone has a different style, a different spin to their writing, and yet everyone also meshes together brilliantly. I’ve been on so many sites - some short lived, others lasted years - and from my own personal experience I think it’s rare to see RPers complement each other as flawlessly as they do on Passing Strange. I believe it stems a lot from the community, because the community is like... it’s like a family, really. Uplifting, supportive, and outrageously funny with some of the greatest banter you can find. Real people with real perspectives on life and above all, real friendships.
    6 points
  27. Personally, I'd say a word count isn't going to stop me from joining a site I really like, but it is going to affect how active I am on the site in general, and a site with a word count is one of the first ones I'll drop if life gets busy. It might make your site a bit of a harder sell to the general public, but if its what you/your members want, then I'd say go for it but be aware that it can open you up to new problems. I've also got some personal experience when it comes to adminning sites with word counts years ago, and found it more hassle than it was worth. Situations can and will come up where a member is 5 words short, you let it slide, but then down the road when someone is 50 words short, they're going to throw that back in your face. It can also lead to situations where specific members feel like they're being targeted if they're often just a little bit short on the requirement, and just general ugliness. It gets even worse when you try and dictate a line or sentence requirement over a hard word count. Between the fact that a responsive layout is going to change how many words you can fit on a line, and that a grammatically correct sentence can be a single word, requirements like that become nigh impossible to enforce without wanting to throw your computer out the window. There's also basically no way to make checking word counts easier/faster without setting up a mod that won't let members post if its below a set number of words, and that's just generally a bad idea. You'll hit situations where the system bugs out, someone counts the number of words wrong, or something else, and now its your fault that they lost their post. At least, in their mind it is. Simply put, there's no shortcut on this one, and its something you're going to have to keep on top of quite aggressively. Lastly, I also have to wonder why you're considering implementing a word count. If its to mitigate situations where there's nothing to respond to, this isn't going to fix it. Its not hard to crank out even a thousand words of fluff with nothing to actually respond to, but hey! It met your word count. Plus, some writers can pull something out of a one-liner to reply to whereas others need a little bit more. If its a case of your members having a preference for longer posts, this will come through naturally and there's not much of a reason to enforce it. I may be missing something here, but the only reason I can see for having a minimum word count is to go "look at how advanced we are!" which can be quite off-putting for a lot of people.
    6 points
  28. Helpful to what, exactly? I’ve never liked word counts and I steer clear of sites that have them in any form (ie; post matching or give what you get). In a single thread I can go from one line to a thousand words. It just depends on what’s happening. More action oriented threads have snappier posts. Conversations don’t need to be fleshed out with a thousand extra words to pad some arbitrary word count. also. I just find they suck the creativity straight out of me. I’m too busy counting words to get properly into the scenario. It’s too much like writing essays in school, which I don’t miss. At all. that said, that’s personal preference. Some people just can’t role play without the challenge or promise of posts of a certain length and that’s where word counts come in. Staff should be reaching out to people with similar mind sets about rp so they’re on the same page, rather than trying to cast the widest net to catch as many players as possible. That way, both staff and members are happy.
    6 points
  29. Tbh... I don't like lower rated sites anymore. I can tell which 333 sites are going to be over the top and I avoid those, but, I also mostly only play on Vesta now, and it has it so that mature content must be opted into, which I think is the best of both worlds. Anyway, I don't do well with censorship. I can FTB just fine but if you're gonna get on me because I used fuck twice in the same sentence, I can't with that. Sometimes, the right word is fuck, okay? Lol I also like the assurance I'm unlikely to be playing with kids. Again, I don't do well with censorship. A lot of my characters' backstories or plotlines involve some very kid-unfriendly things and I'm not toning it down. So I just avoid sites where I may run into one. I don't want to be the one corrupting the young folk. c:
    6 points
  30. Ban them. Whether or not you can turn your site around, I don't know, but it's a step in the right direction. This person is 90% of activity, sure, but they're also 90% of the toxicity on your site. Do you want an active and toxic site? Or a slow and healthy one? Yeah, it's hard to start from scratch, especially when your site is so established, but hell - anything is better than letting this jackwagon continue to spout their bullshit all over your board. Once you get rid of them, whether the site recovers or dies, you've at least done the right thing. And honestly, I'd guess that if you'd gotten rid of this person earlier, and cultivated a healthy atmosphere, the people who would be on your site (who have instead been driven away) would have made up for their absence. And as Somniac said, keep this in mind in your future staffing experiences and make sure you don't let it happen again. Members should be treated equally regardless of how active they are. Once you let someone get away with shit just because they're active? In my experience, it only goes downhill from there. I think it's likely that this person knows you're not comfortable with their behavior but is banking on their activity to keep them untouchable. And that eventually kills sites because the person who faces no consequences is the person really dictating things, regardless of whether or not they're staff.
    6 points
  31. This! I can understand the perspective sometimes from both sides—I can!—but also, yes. I have not always run an 18+ 3/3/3 forum and I have written with folks far younger than me for your exact reasons: there are some brilliant writers out there! Why miss out? ❤️My friends in the real world are not all my age; I have older friends and younger friends and all of these different perspectives are, in my opinion, enriching and important when building a community. It's no different in writing.
    6 points
  32. I originally had on my site something along the lines of "No word count. Write one word or hundreds of thousands. Post matching isn't expected." I took it out and think I should put it back in (site isn't active yet). I think a picture alone should work too if you'd like. I've found that while word counts have died in name, there can be one hidden with, "give someoen something to work with." A few words can move a thread while one of hundreds can just be discussing a table in detail. Word count doesn't mean much there. I automatically think they expect at least 100 words per post and came from site cultures that required word counts back in the day. I've found wishy-washy behavior to be a problem in the rp world. Some while they put in no word count, just have a site culture where members are just verbose and happened naturally. That's okay. It's a bit of a bummer on the one hand that you have to search a bunch of threads, but on the other I know even those who typically do write a lot can clam up with the mention of a word count. I typically tend to be on the shorter end and can struggle to get to 100 words. So to answer the last question, if I suspected I was expected to write long posts or that the community wrote 200+ words each post, I wouldn't join and likely wouldn't stay if I didn't notice. If staff and others told me that my short posts were fine, I'd just continue with my shorter posts and be the oddball, but if I got a message, I'm out. The site states no word count. I should expect no word count and even if the site culture is to write a lot each post to welcome me anyway. Part of being staff is to welcome people as they are.
    5 points
  33. I love everything about this site. From the layout of the forum, to the writers, to the characters, to the plot and everything else that goes into it. You can truly "pass strange" because these people here are lovely. They will bring you into their lives and they will no longer be strangers after a while. I've been writing since 2012, and there hasn't been any place that's been as fun or as welcoming as Passing Strange. I want to be clear that I was not someone interested in vampires/werewolves before I joined this site. I liked fantasy, but it was more akin to Harry Potter kind of fantasy. But I thought the site sounded fun. Lurking through the threads as a guest let me know how active and entertaining this site is. I love this site. I love these people. Ride or die with Passing Strange, for real.
    5 points
  34. tfw you finally finish a huge coding project after several months! 😵 I was so scared how people would receive it because it's a huge CHANGE...but so far, all good feedback which makes it all feel worth it! 🥳
    5 points
  35. Finally writing again! Whew, that was a hiatus.
    5 points
  36. Thank you to everyone who's been reading and replying to this thread. Hearing perspectives from others has certainly helped me to shrug it off a bit more than I was previously. I know that I really just need to stop looking at their site. I cut them out of my life for a reason. But, unfortunately, habits are hard to break. Especially unhealthy ones. @psychodrow (I love your SN) You're 100% right. This is something that I can take in stride and use as fuel to make myself a stronger individual. Letting the actions of others affect me only hurts me. Not anyone else. @Arduinna I certainly wouldn't feel upset if I saw the things that were obviously "inspired" by what we integrated if they were on other sites. I do, unfortunately, know for a fact that they have been skirting around their IP bans to check on us periodically (I use StatCounter to see where my traffic comes from to do the most efficient advertising). Which is why I think it has been such an issue for me. I just need to take a step back and think logically about it. If I wouldn't be upset to see it elsewhere, why am I upset to see it there? They're copying us because these features are useful. @Everglow UGH THAT IS THE WORST. I am so sorry that those people are so obviously jacking your ideas. But yes. I 100% agree with everything you said. DO YOUR OWN WORK. HAVE YOUR OWN THOUGHTS. STOP TRYING TO TAKE MINE. I don't have that many ok. xD (Also just gonna toss in here that I LOVE YOUR SKIN. YOU DID SUCH A GOOD JOB. SO FREAKIN GORGEOUS.)
    5 points
  37. I use Discord all the time. I probably know more about it than the average user, spent some time building Discord bots, created Vesta's seamless Discord integration for those instant notifications of posts that everyone likes Discord for, I'm constantly on it talking to someone. If I'm awake, I'm on Discord. I talk all the time, even in large servers, which should be more difficult for me than it is. Do I wanna RP on it? Aha... no. I left chat-based RP a long time ago and there's many reasons why. I like easily accessible RP histories/archives, I like account-per-player, rapid-fire interaction can cause some issues that are hard to mitigate because of their rapid-fire nature, and I don't like limits. I'm not even talking like I can't keep my replies short; I probably can. I've been known to post 100-200 words at a time if that's all I need and if I don't get too descriptive, I can manage the Discord character limit. The point is it's there. I don't like them. You don't tell me how many characters I can type in a post. End of. It just doesn't jive with me. But I also feel like it's important for RP newbies. I've had a lot of people new to RP join Simprovise's Discord and seem to think we were a Discord RP, and then leave when we weren't, so I have the feeling that RP newbies may be more willing to give it a try with something as easy as Discord. And eventually, they may later transition to other platforms, as many of us that have RP'd for a while have done at some point. So it gives me the idea that Discord RP may be relatively integral to the revival of certain kinds of RP, by indirectly bringing new people to them, and I think it's beneficial to us all that Discord RP exists. Forum RP is becoming more lax over time, thankfully, and that's a good start too, but Discord doesn't require any of the hoops that forum RP does. And yeah there are a few hoops to it inherently. A new login to remember, images, apps, plot threads, things like that, they're kind of intimidating. Discord RP is still not and probably won't ever be truly for me, I can see myself doing 1x1s in a private server, but nothing beyond that, and I can still see its merit. Forum RP is just better suited to me and what I want out of an RP.
    5 points
  38. How do you get past that? If I were you: I'd sit back a couple days later once I know I'm as collected as I'm going to get, consider their complaints, consider what might have triggered their complaints ... and then decide from there how much was based on you, and how much was based on them. Unless they're a pathological liar or suffering through some sort of major distortion of reality (hopefully temporary and quickly sorted), chances are they're making some points, regardless of how ineffectively. I'd take inventory of their complaints and weigh it against my own (and possibly other involved peoples') impressions. If I did some of those things - well, that's embarrassing. At least I know where to start. How do you protect your community? If I were you, and had reason to believe a lot of people onsite had been effected by this (IE they said something)? I'd mention it, mention I'm working on any claims I can see their points on, and ask if the other points rang true to anyone to see if that needed further consideration. If everyone there already agrees it's weird drama? Brush off said weird drama and put your attention where it matters. How do you show prospective members that the review is invalid due to their rule breaking? That's two different issues. Does jaywalking invalidate everything a person might say about that street from that point onward. No, it doesn't. Is the reason they're going on this campaign to cover up their wrongdoing? That's different, and malicious. You will never beat a jackass at jackassery unless you become an even bigger jackass yourself - and is that a game you really want to win?
    5 points
  39. What has been said before is accurate, as it's really a series of separate challenges (I know some might say issue but challenge is a a word I prefer), the first one is the admin on the site, they had the challenge of an individual who clashed - for whatever reasons - and then ultimately made the decision to leave. So, far that seems to be handled fairly well, not perhaps an ideal as it would be wonderful to imagine we can all get along all of the time, sadly we do not live in that utopia... Now, this is where it breaks down, the memes and the posts. I don't know why this Amy did that, it feels childish and a little... unexpected, as I can't imagine it helped or made anyone else on that site feel like they were being respected and that is perhaps, along with whatever happened before regarding their own clash within the site culture, one of the reasons that those directly involved just wanted Amy's character to be killed off. Yes, it's the easy option but this might have just felt like the point of just being too exhausting to do anything else. Is it the right one to take? Probably not, as said there are a lot of other creative options that could be taken but it might just have been a cause of wanting that line drawn so everyone else could just move on. Amy's behaviour of rejoining and repeatedly making demands and/or other actions probably weren't helping anyone experience much sympathy regarding her on the site, especially as this appears to be when she also started to mention mental health issues and her own needs not being met. It is sad that no one was able to help her and it's sad that matters escalated in this way, however, Amy could have made it a lot easier for herself if she had made a plan for her own character's exit, graceful, messy or chaotic! Ultimately, she didn't do that and is not dealing with the results of everything that's gone before. It is simple to say, the admin shouldn't have allowed the character to be killed off and perhaps in the future that wouldn't happen, the circumstances change, we grow as people and this is likely to be a learning experience for everyone if nothing else. With respect to her treatment of you specifically, it sounds very like she has the expectation that you will be her ally and should be on her side, so anytime you offer help and/or suggestions that are either ignoring the narrative she wants to pursue or is about helping with her mental health, Amy becomes hostile; the whole throwing words and phrases back at you kinda of thing. All I would suggest is telling her you don't want to speak about these matters any more, and that if she isn't happy about that you will have to take the action to block her as you really don't need to have this additional stress in your own life - I presume? Basically, your not her therapist, or her go-between and she shouldn't feel like she can use you that way. Also, as you've clearly said that you don't want her behaviour before, it is her harassing you because you've said I don't want it and she is still continuing. I hope you get some peace again.
    5 points
  40. Similarities between characters are usually unintentional. Ideas pop up in our heads and we don't always know where they came from - it could be from a movie you watched five years ago, or a book you read three months ago...or even a character profile you don't actually remember reading. Sure, people occasionally make copies of our characters and change just enough about them to pass, but that's pretty rare, and they're more likely to be mortified to realise much later that they accidentally took inspiration from someone else's work. At the end of the day, I don't think it really matters. Someone could copy my character profile word for word (and some have over the years) and still not end up with the same character as me because they don't write the way I do. At worst, they'll end up with a stale, stunted version of the original they aren't able to connect with - at best, the character will evolve and change to become something of their own completely distinct from my character. Either way, I don't see the point in getting upset about it. Focus on being the best you you can be.
    5 points
  41. Today, we'll be coding this: Or at least, making something very similar. I created this a long time ago for my fantasy site's historical timeline. It is entirely CSS and HTML, and you may need to fiddle with the precise numbers, but for the most part, it should be pretty straightforward. So to get started, we want a container div. You can call this container div whatever you'd like, but mine calls it timeline_container. We want this to have a relative position, and you'll probably want to set a max-width and ensure it margins 0 auto so that it centres. .timeline_container { position: relative; max-width: 1200px; margin: 0 auto; } To create the timeline bar, we create a pseudo selector for .timeline_container::after - or whatever it is you called your timeline container. Set it to position absolute, a width, and then position absolute, top and bottom at 0, and left at 50%. You may need to fiddle with positioning a bit using margining. .timeline_container::after { content: ''; position: absolute; top: 0; bottom: 0; left: 50%; width: 6px; background-color: #808080; } By the way, #808080 is exactly 50% saturation grey, so you can usually see it okay on both light and dark themes. Now, we have our bar. We need to create a box that we can use to show events on either side of this centre vertical bar. We're going to use basically the same box, and just add a second class to it that alters positioning, so that we have "containerclass positionclass" for classing. Let's call this container class .timeline_box. I gave mine 10px 40px padding, a 50% width, inherited background, and a relative positioning. We won't be creating the appearance styling for the boxes in this part, but in an inner content class in a minute. .timeline_box { padding: 10px 40px; position: relative; background-color: inherit; width: 50%; } There is a pseudo-selector we need to use on timeline_box, this being ::after. This will create the dot on the timeline. We set this to position: absolute, 25px width and height, give it a background colour and, if desired, a border, z-index 1 and top and right positioning to get it where we want. Mine ended up top 15px and right -14px, but this didn't hold up recreating it elsewhere, so you will most likely need to mess with it. .timeline_box::after { content: ''; position: absolute; top: 15px; right: -14px; width: 25px; height: 25px; background: #222; border: 4px solid; border-radius: 50%; z-index: 1; } You might notice here that I have a border but no colouring. This is because I added other classes to colour-code the dots by era and so I set the border-colour elsewhere, so if you're not going to be doing that, you may want to set the border colour here. Next, we need to create the box positioning. We do this with two other classes, called .timeline_left and .timeline_right. These are very simple classes, all they have in the CSS for them is left: 0 and left: 50%. Now, it seems like you would create timeline_right with right: 0; but right: 0 is in a place we aren't expecting, and places the timeline box also on the left side. With the .timeline_left and .timeline_right classes, we'll add ::before pseudo-selectors to create arrows. These will point at the dot on the timeline and make it look a little fancier. You can skip this if you don't feel the need for these. .timeline_left::before { content: ''; position: absolute; height: 0; width: 0; top: 22px; right: 30px; z-index: 1; border: medium solid white; border-width: 10px 0 10px 10px; border-color: transparent transparent transparent #343434; } .timeline_right::before { content: ''; position: absolute; height: 0; width: 0; top: 22px; left: 30px; z-index: 1; border: medium solid white; border-width: 10px 10px 10px 0; border-color: transparent #343434 transparent transparent; } Again, you will likely have to fiddle with the positioning. Now, the last piece of the puzzle is to create the box itself. We'll call this internal box .timeline_content. Padding, a background colour, position relative, and a 6px border radius ought to do the trick. .timeline_content { padding: 10px 15px; background: #343434; position: relative; border-radius: 6px; } Remember that whatever you make the content box's background will have to be the same colour as on the non-transparent bordering of _left::before and _right::before. Here you'll likely find that you need to fiddle with the positioning finally, if you haven't already, as you find the results are a little out of alignment, but you should eventually have something like this. And there we go. That's all there is to it. c: You can add embellishments and colour code your timeline if you'd like, I colour-coded mine by era and added a pulsating CSS animation effect on the timeline markers, but it's up to you what you do from here! Have fun! (This was a terrible tutorial, I'm half awake, sorry. xD)
    5 points
  42. I hope everyone is doing alright during these trying times. ❤️
    5 points
  43. 5 points
  44. Tell them that you don't like what they're doing and they need to stop if they're to remain on your site. Don't try to fluff it up or leave any room for ambiguity. "This stops or you leave." If you're comfortable reviewing what they've written, point out the areas where they crossed the line so they have a better frame of reference for where the line is and where they need to stop. If you're nice, anyway, because if I was in your shoes, I'd just tell them that they're creeping me out and are therefore banned from my site, don't let the door hit you where the good Lord split you. This person knows better than to be graphically describing non-con all over the place. I can't imagine that it could possibly be justified to have it present so often in their character's threads even if it was mentioned/implied. And just the fact that they flipped on this other player would have had me giving them a stern warning about what's expected from them if they want to stay on my site. I'd bet cash that they're well aware that they're disturbing people and are taking advantage of you not stopping them to just further freak people out. And that means they need to go. So in short, I would not tell them anything other than they're being booted. Maybe word it something like, "You are being removed from [site name] as staff finds your repeated graphic descriptions of sexual assault far outside the boundaries of the behavior we accept onsite." Ban them from the site via IP and email address, remove them from the Discord server, block them on Discord, and move on secure in the knowledge that you - and your players - are much more the better for it.
    5 points
  45. My favorite thing about being an admin: when my events are a HIT!
    5 points
  46. This is the topic for me to answer. If ever there was one...it is this. Ok so, quick backstory. Nothing drama happened with my site or any that I was a member on, I just flat out had a full plate. Medullary Thyroid Cancer can do that! Stress with work. Brain fog from the thyroid issue...you name it. How I got back into the hobby and habit? I fell back in love with it. I took the few things that I loved/hated with the whole ordeal and just sort of sorted that into different places. 1. Admin duties. I didn't hate doing them, but you do feel guilty and almost unwelcome. Especially for me when I didn't tell anyone what was going on at the time, mostly because everything happened so fast. I let that go. I let it alllll go. You have to let go of the guilt. Because 9 times out of 10 it is only you that is feeling it. Like no one is angry at you. No one should be angry at you. If they are? Well...they need a life yo. These things happen! 2. Fall back in love with your characters. Fall hard for them. For me, I found a PB that I have always wanted to use and I flat out used him to a point that I love love love to write him. Like when I think about him I get excited and want to write him further! 3. Fall back in love with life. Read a book. Watch a movie. Go on a long walk in the woods. For me? I took the whole fall/winter as a time to recover not only from the shock of having cancer, but from the fact I have had it so long my body was just getting used to it. Stress is a cancer. Work stress. Life stress. It is all cancer. Mental health is as bad as any cancer out there, and just because you can't see it doesn't mean it isn't hurting you. Make sure your heart is full and that your mind is right. 4. Last but not least. Lean in on your loved ones. Find those sweet happy little souls that make this hobby so much fun and know that your true friends will always welcome you back in. And if they don't? Find a new tribe.
    5 points
  47. Hello, I've pulled my head out of my ass and would like to be an rper again 😅
    5 points
  48. I'm sitting here on the other end of the spectrum, been 18 for less than a year and what I've most encountered were people who refused to plot and thread with me because the mere thought of talking to me made them unconfortable. Nevermind I consider myself a rather talented writer (for somebody who has English as her second language, that is), and I am self-confident enough that besides getting sad there are people who refuse to plot with me, I'm more sad for them for losing the opportunity. Anyways, I just wanted to say I'm sorry you have gone through this. One of my favorite writers in the whole world, whom I've written with for a year (even before I was 18) must be 36-years-old now, and her age or my age had nothing to do with how well we hit it off/how well we thought of each other's writing. Age shouldn't have a play in how we decide things, RP-wise. Sure, there's the matter of 3/3/3 and minors, but as far as plotting goes when you're both adults? Then I'm just rolling my eyes at all the ageism. It feels so unnecessary.
    5 points
  49. @MuseYES YES YES on the ageism. I've seen it too, and actually had to bite my tongue on Reddit for that reason (player refused RPers that were female and men over 40). The fact you've experienced this makes me sooo angry.
    5 points
  50. When I look at a site, here's what turns me off from it: Applications Now, someone who has looked at a kiss of darkness is probably aware that we have an approval system for our characters, however this is not required to be filled out completely in order to play and use your character. We actually have it on approval solely for the purpose of skimming the application to make the character fit. Obviously, that's the whole purpose of applications, however strict applications are an entirely different demon to face. I absolutely loathe sites where I need to come up with a detailed history for a character before I even touch them. Sometimes, I've got a name, a home, and a look, and that's it for the first several days to months of playing the character. I prefer to fill in the biography as I figure it out, not to prep for being able to play a character whose history might warp and change. 3/3/3 Rated Sites, Strict Rules, and Censoring It's amazing how some sites have rules that are extremely restricting in all regards, even down to what you can and cannot write/mention. Now, this isn't in regard to thread markings like [TW], [CW], etc. I fully believe in properly labeling threads as a warning to potential readers that "Hey, you might see something in this!" What I don't like is when a site censors with this rating--and it happens. I think if you're going to use that rating, you need to be prepared for your writers to actually use it. There are several 3/3/3 sites that should honestly be rated 2/2/2, if you catch my drift. Atmosphere One of the largest barriers I've come across is the atmosphere perpetrated by players of a game. I typically hop in the discord for a bit while I look around (it takes me approximately a month read everything pertaining to character creation and decide whether or not I want to play). I will lurk in discords to get an idea of how the players of a certain site are. If they're friendly and encouraging and willing to plot with me, I'm usually do create a character to play. However, many times I find that when it comes to discussing creating a character, members of the site go quiet. There is a lack of interest in RPing with a new person and ultimately, I leave the discord and choose not to play on said site. This also applies to things such as loss of interest/lack of priority. I am a slow poster. I post 1-2 times a day, sometimes more. It really, truly depends on my mood (I am chronically ill). I've been in places where someone wanted to RP with me and ultimately were not interested so they pushed our rp to the back of their priorities, i.e., they are rapid-fire posting, but not responding to our rp. Unwelcoming The biggest barrier I've encountered when joining new sites is a lack of welcome. I put that in bold because it's extremely important for the growth of a new site. Whenever someone joins my site or discord, I try to acknowledge them asap. I ask them what they like to write, what sort of character they are thinking about, etc. I hit on this in the last bullet, but this is where the encouragement comes in.
    5 points
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