Membership Have you ever considered that maybe you want to stop RPing?

[VVitch 8]

On 10/24/2018 at 2:10 PM, Anonymous said:

Do you ever feel this way? How do you deal with it if you do?

 

 Yes, I have felt that way many times. I am apart of a community of chatters where one particular realm which hosts some 'older' chatters has a hard time keeping up with the changing societal landscapes of our world. Basically, they are a bit bigoted without really realizing it and outdated in their view of the world both on and offline. As an example some of them are very uncomfortable with roleplayers playing characters opposite their rt gender (which not surprisingly leaves transgender players with a target on their backs). They also loathe the use of multiple characters and insist that players in the realm can only have one character.

 

Enter me and my roleplay partner who love the genre and the realm while detesting the politics and culture at play within the broader population. We create a space that allows for multiple characters and less emphasis on who is behind the characters. It is a space completely autonomous from the 'realm' and we don't care about who is behind the characters or the veil of IC vs OOC. That space thrives and explodes with roleplay and has for the past 6 years despite other spaces in that same genre struggling. In that time players in the broader realm continue to nit pick, attack and outright opinionated with frequency on forums about how this sort of roleplay has tarnished a realm that was built on 'tradition'.

 

It's some mind boggling stuff and gives insight into how entitled people get when they are part of a community for any length of time. They believe they own it by virtue of their own longevity rather than what they contribute to it. Even then they attempt to measure contributions against the way it is done believing there is a 'right way' and a 'wrong way'. Obviously to them I fall into the 'wrong way' category despite the success of the space we have built.

 

Anyways, I get really irate at the attempts to diminish and demean by way of fear mongering and arguing not with facts but from a place of emotion. In the past 6 years that our space has been open no one has been harmed or manipulated behind the scenes as is this unreasonable prevailing fear harboured by the older chatters. Players simply are not creating multiple characters to lead people on and treat them terribly, or luring them into roleplay death traps and other deceitful scenarios and yet these old fuckers persist in opinionating about a segment of the realm that is effectively minding its own business and being bad asses. It is likely resentment of our success and jealousy drives them and it's unseemly.

 

So yes, I have wanted to leave and yet I stay out of sheer stubbornness and a desire to be the last one standing LOL I have contributed to something great and entertaining, and I deserve to enjoy it. Drama and personal issues ARE a determent to roleplay anywhere but they shouldn't be allowed to impact us on an individual level for too long. It takes a bit of confidence and a 'fuck you' attitude to keep slugging through the bs though. Also, being a bit of a troll helps too lol Now whenever some chatter starts up with their lip I just post 'shameless plugs' about my roleplay with the understanding there is no such thing as bad publicity. Sometimes shameless self promotion is the best way to shut a hater up. They won't love you, but you can love yourself!

 

Edited January 15, 2019 by VVitch

[Bowie 25]

I love writing but I also hate the drama (I mean unless I’m totally uninvolved with no skin in the game: harmless drama I can watch is pleasing, but preferably not on my site thanks). Every time I’ve quit a site or moved on in my life with a long hiatus it has invariably been because some players or elements of the community felt toxic to me, and I knew that me staying wouldn’t help.

 

I don’t know that I’ll ever want to not write stories with people. I love it, but I certainly know I don’t want to write stories with SOME people.

 

Much like VVitch, I’ve founded a safe, welcoming place in a realm of queer and transphobia, which feels nice. Giving people a comforting place to play feels really good. Because when choosing my morality vs my enjoyment of role play, as I get older and more radicalized in my sensibilities, the more I definitively lean towards my morality. 

 

So uh, to answer the question: yes and no. I tire of role playing with people and at places and sometimes that makes me take a looooong break when that clash happens. How to combat it is to make sure that I have no reservations with the people I surround myself with.