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Internal Monologue


Deacon Frost
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So; I've been on some boards that have a rule where anything you write in your character's internal monologue is fair game for the other character to react to under the justification of "it was in your body language." I have to admit that I wasn't a fan of that. 

 

How do you feel about internal monologue? I recently had a friend venting because the person they were playing with had a weird habit of rewriting her character's internal monologue from their character's perspective and then using it to make their character seem BETTER than my friends. So like, if she said "She felt so awkward about this whole situation, but she was trying to hide it to avoid looking foolish" the other person might say something like "She could see how awkward the woman felt about this situation but unlike her she wasn't trying to hide it; she was calm and collected." 

 

How does internal monologue interactions like that affect how you feel about the RP? Do you want no internalizing, a lot, a little? Do you think it should automatically be telegraphed? 

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Personally, I would not join a site where metagaming / use of OOC knowledge is expected. I hope sites that allow this would have that information in their writing guidelines or rules. If it is not listed anywhere in site guidelines and rules and I learned about this after the fact, I would do one of two things...politely resign and cite the issue as my reason, stop writing much in the way of internal monologue / only write visual cues via facial expressions and body language (very restrictive IMHO). However, I do respect the rights of site creators to decide what they allow and what they don't.

 

Now, I am a fan of internal monologue and narration of a scene so the setting and atmosphere is easily visualized by the other writers. I try to make it clear which bits are open for other characters to see and interpret and which ones are not. We also still have the silly rule against using OOC Knowledge to gain leverage and metagaming. Despite this, occasionally, a writer misinterprets and still uses OOC knowledge in their response. It will happen on occasion and if it is minor (not a major story impact), I let it go. When a writer makes a habit of using it to always make their character outshine mine, I will eventually call them on it. Sometimes I contact them OOC, sometimes I have my character turn it around on them. Perhaps my character is thinking of a petty crime he committed and the other character says something about it. My character immediately gets suspicious and outright hostile, asking who informed on them and how could they possibly know since he's not yet told anyone.

 

No matter how you slice it, it is a slippery slope!

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Someone somewhere went to sleep and dreamed us all alive.
Dreams get pushed around a lot, and I doubt if we'll survive.
We won't get to wake up, dreams were born to disappear.
And I'm pretty sure that none of us are here.
~ None of Us Here by Jim Stafford ~

 

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In the case of the board with the no-internal monologue or it's KNOWN the rule was clearly stated and the explanation for it was that it was meant to prevent people from being passive aggressive in their posts. Like acting polite to a character while constantly thinking unpleasant shit at them and not allowing them to respond to the abuse IC. That was a sheeted board so people always had the option of trying something like a sense motive roll to detect the undercurrent of hostility but the Storyteller got sick of a few members sniping at each other. At least that's what I understood. 

 

In the case of my friend being unhappy with the monologue one-ups-manship I agree with you. I feel like she should find a way to talk to the other player about it. 

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2 hours ago, StormWolfe said:

I am a fan of internal monologue and narration of a scene so the setting and atmosphere is easily visualized by the other writers. I try to make it clear which bits are open for other characters to see and interpret and which ones are not.

 

So am I. I think internal monologue gives characters depth and shows them as they are, because some people say one thing and think another.

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Ok, first: The use of internalized thoughts in your writing is GOLD and everyone should do it. Not only does it build a scene and develop your character in more than just their actions and words, but it's damn amusing to both read and write. I think there is a lot to be said about a writer that adds both speech, body language and movement, action, and internal thought to their post. People as a whole are not one-dimensional being. We think while we speak, we say things while feeling others, and this should ALL make it into your posting whenever possible.

Second: There is a special level of hell reserved for people who use OOC information IC'ly (wow is that a word? It's a word now, let's move on) It's right beside the one for people who talk in the theatre. Seriously! If that were the case I would go -off- in some broken fourth wall ranting about how my character could -not- believe that there were some writers who couldn't pull their heads out of their asses long enough to formulate something decent. Also... no! Don't do it! Bad Juju!

It is most definitely ooc/metagaming bullshit to do that. I would not stand for it. nope nope, no sir!

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The past is a place of reference, not residence.

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I'm not a fan of internal monologue in many cases. Some writing styles don't differentiate it well from other parts of the writing making it great fodder for accidental mindreading mishaps. other times I've seen it used to the extreme with paragraphs of monologue for maybe a sentence or two of action or even nothing to work with at all, leading to frustration to me when I'm trying to come up to a reply to stuff only going on in a character's head.

 

That said, when a post is formatted well, and it's clear what elements of the paragraphs are what, it can be very useful for setting a character's tone and style. I use it most when writing in first person where everything is coming from a character's perspective anyway, or in using a phrase or two to punctuate an action or reaction that I also describe, so that body language supports the monologue.  I try to have my internal monologue moments be as relevant to the scene as possible. if it isn't something that's important to the here and now of the story, I'd rather save it for a one shot, or other form of rp-related writing.

 

Also it depends on my rp partners as well, I am likely to start pairing down the amount of monologue I use if my partners start making inferences to things I didn't specify as being part of my character's reactions. Sometimes one can even lie in an internal monologue, with the character's known intent being different than their actual intent and leading to shenanigans later on when a character realizes they've misunderstood a situation the whole time.

Edited by Kazetatsu
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I think that if you put it out there, you should expect it to be used.

 

Of course common sense applies that very detailed monologue wouldn't be discernable barring mind reading powers or something but if you really don't want it to be used (or used against you) you probably shouldn't be putting it out there.

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I dislike reading and writing internal monologue. For me, it takes away the vital mystery of what's going to happen next, how the other character really feels about mine, and where this interaction is going. If I wanted to know everything about the other character then I'd just write by myself.

 

Also if, on the rare occasion that I offer some small insight into my character's mindset, I get back an answer or rebuttal in the other character's internal monologue, I will never do it again with that player. I'm not here for meta-bullshit internal monologue arguments, that's just bad RP all around.

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On 4/7/2019 at 7:48 AM, Spirit Caller said:

I recently had a friend venting because the person they were playing with had a weird habit of rewriting her character's internal monologue from their character's perspective and then using it to make their character seem BETTER than my friends. So like, if she said "She felt so awkward about this whole situation, but she was trying to hide it to avoid looking foolish" the other person might say something like "She could see how awkward the woman felt about this situation but unlike her she wasn't trying to hide it; she was calm and collected." 

 

this is something i feel like i saw more in the good old days, but it still crops up and here and there for me.

 

on one hand, i get it. you want to respond to the other character and flesh out the scene, which can be hard if there's not a lot of actions. it's even harder when the other person doesn't make obvious what parts of their narration are observable. but not everything in a post is meant for the other character; narration is mostly meant for the readers. 

 

that's why i generally take the extra step to specify. including things like, "soandso was nervous, and felt like character b could tell," or, "character b wouldn't notice, but soandso was seething," in a post makes sure it's clear what's observable and what's not..

 

if that doesn't work then i usually assume that it's not just the player trying to flesh out a thread and is instead purposeful powerplaying or at the least, carelessness.

 

in that instance i just avoid putting in too much narration and just write what's perceivable to the other character. generally, though, too much of that turns me off to a thread. if it's just sometimes then, whatever, i don't mind too much. but if it's obvious that this person believes their character should know every little thing just because it's included in a post, then i'll drop the whole thing.

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