Possible Ban Evasion

[Anonymous 234]

I am at a conundrum.

 

Recently, someone joined my site that I am 99% sure is someone who was banned permanently. My co-admin first brought this concern to me, but while we both have a gut feeling this person is the banned individual, I'm not sure if I have enough evidence to take action.

 

However, I am coming to you all for advice.

 

What would you do if your gut was screaming that this person is definitely the person who was banned?

 

 

Anonymous poster hash: 7acbf...75d

[Somniac 207]

Ban them.

[Sparky Muse 16]

Look at their writing style, how they use words, their IP address, how they design their characters, etc.

If it matches up, to be on the safe side, shoot them an email/letter announcing the reasons why you're banning them before you actually ban them and say that you're apologizing if you're wrong about who they are (even if you're not actually sorry; it sometimes keeps them a little less salty about the mistaken identity thing)

[Dragon 673]

2 hours ago, Sparky Muse said:

Look at their writing style, how they use words, their IP address, how they design their characters, etc.

 

Sparky pretty much sums up everything here as far as attempting to verify suspicions. Checking the email address on file for similarities can be useful too, as every now and then people will accidentally give themselves away with the alt. I would also add to see if this person is trying to recreate any plots the banned member was involved in. 

 

Of course its your site. All you need is a reasonable suspicion to justify a ban, and there's no reason to feel guilty if you decide to. It's pretty rare that flags like that get set off, and they're usually correct. 

 

Alternatively (assuming it wasn't a ban for egregious reasons like threats, bullying etc), a tertiary option - if you're feeling generous and the ban circumstances weren't just completely horrible - would be to wait out a trial period and see if they learned their lesson. That said, your phrasing suggests this one isn't a good option lol!

 

Personally, though, I agree with @Somniac. There's enough BS OOC drama rampaging through the RP verse, so when there's a chance to nip it in the bud I say do it while the going is easy. 

[Dreadling 14]

I'd let them stay if they behaved themselves. If the banned member is willing to come back and play nice, I'm happy to welcome them back.

[Honorem 219]

On 5/24/2019 at 10:39 AM, Dreadling said:

I'd let them stay if they behaved themselves. If the banned member is willing to come back and play nice, I'm happy to welcome them back.

Agreed. Also, if they stay for a while and it is indeed the same person, you'll find more and more similarities until it's too similar to be a coincidence.

 

You could also politely ask them if they are such and such member that used to be on the site, in a politely worded PM? Without mentioning any bans or what not, on the off chance they are not that person. Doesn't hurt to ask, and if they say no, you can say something along the lines of 'no problems, you just reminded me of them is all'.

 

At any rate good luck.

[Somniac 207]

I wouldn't want someone around who thought the rules didn't apply to them. This might be experience bias, but what I've seen happen in those cases is it starts off subtle and then they continually escalate until things are back to (or worse than) the first round.

 

To me, 99%  certainty is "unless Real Life decides to pull a Shameless episode", which doesn't actually happen that often. If your rules and enforcement are reasonable, and it still made the most sense to ban this person, I don't see the point in a second chance.

 

That said, if the rules were unreasonable (say, lifetime ban for something a 12 year old might grow out of), it's a good time to reevaluate your rules and own that you were too punitive last round.

[Rhindeer 217]

Nope. Ban evasion is not cool, and it would not make me want to give the person a second chance. If anything, it would just confirm even more so that they're not a good fit.

 

The thing is, I'm all about second chances (depending on the infraction--predatory behavior, for example, is something I don't give second chances for). I truly think people can change and grow and become better people, and people just do stupid things when they're young. 13 year old me is a different person from 35 year old me.

 

If someone comes up and apologizes and takes responsibility for what they did and seems sincere, then I'm totally willing to give them a second chance. I banned someone once for awful behavior, and years later they emailed me a sincere apology with no excuses. The key here was that they acknowledged that they were in the wrong, that they understood what they did wrong and why I made the decision I did, and that they just wanted to make things right after time had passed and they had grown. They owned everything; they didn't try to deflect blame.

 

I let them back in, and they were a good member for the time they stayed around. ❤️

 

If they had tried to evade the ban and be sneaky and dishonest, the story would have had a much different outcome.

[HotPinkUnicornMess 51]

Depends. 

1. What did they do to get banned in the first place? Meaning, is it a problem behavior like stalking or continued harassment that speaking to this person like they were an adult didn't ever manage to get through? My experience is, if you ask them to stop more than once and they don't--they won't. Repeat offenders not willing to listen to rules and sense, ban again. 

2. Is the email the same? 

3. Is the IP exactly the same? 

4. When you look up the email or IP, do you find a) spam, problem posts, or posts from them from their old RP names (or perhaps they are the kind that keep re-using the same name or character on other sites.) 

5. Your site. Your instinct. If it's practically screaming to ban this person it might be the right thing to listen. And you know what? It won't hurt in the long run if you find out you have accidentally banned the wrong person. You can always apologize and explain that you had issues with someone from the same IP/email/Similar characters and decided to try and safeguard your website before the problem happened again. IF, and IF, this isn't the person you banned---yes--you may lose them as a new member, but you absolutely, 100% did the correct thing to ensure the sanity, safety, and sanctity of your website first whilst being a responsible admin and handling it after. 

[Squid 5]

I'd follow your gut, especially if you have another person who also thinks the same thing. If you are still very unsure, you could inform the rest of your staff and ask them to keep a close eye on the person for a few days, and if at the end of that time, they also think that it's the same person, then come down with the ban hammer!

[Sora 29]

Definitely  tricky. I try to save all the information I have on the banned individual somewhere safe (like in the admin only section). I'll save URLs to their apps, to their threads, I'll save pictures of things they've said in the chat. IP address, birthday, and email. Basically the more the better. 

 

Then, if someone ever joins that gives me the vibes they might be the same person, I have everything in one place and can start comparing. 

 

If I don't find anything definite I will let them join the site but keep a very close eye on them. If they start to exhibit the same behavior to the banned individual, I'll ban them.

[Nevermind 64]

Ban them.

 

Although I appreciate the goodwill some others have commented on here, I personally would not want someone on my site who tried to evade a ban. If they had truly learned their lesson, they would be an adult, own up to their mistakes and contact you directly asking if they could come back, not sneak around and try to create a new account under your nose. Allowing that person to stay sends the message that not only are your rules and decisions easily tossed aside, but that you're a push over. You absolutely do not need to run your site with an iron fist, but letting people walk all over you underneath the cloak of mercy isn't a great image to project, either. 

 

I have previous experience on an old site with someone who attempted to evade bans multiple times. This person continuously contacted members asking for roleplays which involved topics explicitly forbidden by the site's rules. Each time this person attempted to come back (every couple of months or so), they would do the same thing all over again and we'd have to repeat the process of banning account after account. This person most likely used a VPN and made accounts using fake emails, but the content he was asking for was always the same, hence our ability to know it was him. Some people do have the capacity to shape up and learn from their mistakes. Others will attempt to get their way however they can, and it is sometimes difficult to tell which is which.

 

If you're sure this person is who you think they are, they should be punished for disrespecting your rules and evading their ban. Ban them, send a message explaining precisely why, and offer them the opportunity to contact you if they would like to discuss the situation. If there is opportunity for them to potentially come back in the future, you can let them know that, but let them know it is on your terms.