Jump to content

What would you do about this member?


Sammiie
 Share

Recommended Posts

What should be done about this member?


Hi guys! I wanted to ask a bit of advice regarding one roleplayer that's on my site right now.

Juuust gonna quote myself from the reply I just posted to another thread that explains the situation well:
 

Quote

 

Have a member that is getting real annoying with the characters they're making (and then not playing).

 

Their character applications derail off the realism scale (and our lore scale). Every single character they've made on site so far has needed heavy modifications. There's lots of back-and-forth between us and them, lots of corrections. And they don't always do the edits we ask them to - they'll change like one or two sentences, but ignore the big stuff we just told them doesn't make sense. Then we gotta go back and tell them in even simpler terms what we want them to fix. It's honestly just a grueling process for everyone.

 

And it wouldn't be bad if they made their characters and stuck with them. But instead, they create a character, after this process of an app-accepting process, post like 5x max, disappear for a month, and then come back claiming they've lost muse for the character they created and they'd like to drop them. Then they join with two new characters and the process begins all over again.

 

Well, recently. We've tagged on some consequences. The last time they came back and dropped all their characters (this is the second time, we've now gone through 3 characters, two from the first time, and then the one they dropped when they returned again), we decided that enough was enough and we placed a month-long character ban on them, asking them to also make at least 15 posts with their remaining character before they ask for another one. [They were originally planning to drop both of their characters, but upon learning that they wouldn't be able to make two new ones, they kept the one.]

 

They proceed to ask us twice during this timeframe, despite our terms being clearly stated in their messages, whether they can now make a new character. When we ask them to gain the posts, we get a mysterious "new person" with an IP address that matches theirs. Given we've been getting a lot of these lately (people who think they can just disappear, avoid the consequences for letting their characters go inactive, and join up and act like a new person), we reached out to their original account and asked them.

 

They told us their sister joined up, but she's not going to be staying because she's not interested. I smell bullshit. Neither of them have been on since. 

 

I can't figure out if they're purposely trolling us... or just don't know what they want. 

 


At this point, if they come back (which I'm sure they will after a month of ghosting on us), I'm considering writing them and politely telling them that we're a RP more suited for long-term characters, explain that their frequent switching and dropping is frustrating to us as well (entirely due to how many edits every one of their applications need), and to possibly suggest a different kind of site that allows a more freeform way to RP (like the kind that don't do apps, sites that have a multi-universe, create-your-own-roleplay freeform style; I've seen them out there). 

 

The reason I'm asking advice, though, is because my reasoning is pretty selfish. It's annoying, sure, but really they're not doing anything wrong. Aside from attempting to bypass our rules once, they didn't actually roleplay under the guise of their "sister," but it certainly was a red flag! However, we usually wait for more than one rule infractions before sending a warning. Three warnings eventually equal a ban. 

 

What would you do in this situation? Am I wrong to ask this roleplayer to look elsewhere for a RP that better suits them? Any advice will be appreciated! Sorry for the long winded description xD 
 

  • Like 1

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I gotta be honest here. I'm like the most forgiving person I know. I only put my foot down when it's really needed. If this were me though, I would politely do like you said. Tell them they are not going to be a good fit for your site and maybe suggest some other ones. They seem like they keep coming back because they can keep getting away with it. Honestly you don't really owe anyone any kind of explanation as to what  you do or why you do it. If they haven't taken the past 2 suggestions they won't be reasonable so perhaps it's time to have them move along and you do what's best for you. If you have to take an ibuprofen/tylenol every time you talk them, it's a good bet to save yourself the heartache and let them do their thing, over there, somewhere else, with other folks. Just because we're admins, we're human too and don't have to take anything that takes away our enjoyment.

Edited by Prophetess
I really need to reread before posting.
  • Like 2
  • Agree 1

spacer.pngDecadence

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Your plan for the if/when of their return seems to be entirely appropriate to me. 

 

This not really breaking the rules is one of the main ways that individuals like this believe they can keep on getting away with things. I am making an assumption that you have a respect rule of some kind and the fact is they aren't respecting you, your fellow staff or the site and members.

 

Let's look at it this way, they aren't respecting your lore because they've made 3+ characters now and know the rules/lore and expectations of what they should be doing. Nor are they respecting your members, who I assume are trying to interact/plot and have some kind of thread with them, this is someone who is coming in and out and basically playing some rather weird game of the hokey pokey and it makes it next to impossible for your members to interact with them, which is a self-isolating behaviour in and of itself. Do you think your members want to have so much hard work? Especially with very little return. 

 

Finally, this sister it is a Red Flag and suggests that they were testing the waters and attempting to circumvent your rules and honestly do you want to continue to allow them to go on? You deserve to be having fun and enjoying your site, not worrying about this member who seems to be more determined to bend rules and frustrate yourself and the other members of staff who have to deal with their whole application process. 

  • Like 1
  • Agree 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

It's possible that that's their sister and they invited them to try and get more interested in a site (I've done that with my partner, and we live together), but I'd be more inclined to believe that if they hadn't already wracked up an extensive history of rules-bending and heckling for special treatment.

 

I actually don't mind the "will this character fly" type testing, as that's as much a staff question as a playerbase one and sometimes jumping in is the most straightforward way of finding out. (Granted, if someone made nothing but mecha-suit catgirls in our Victorian-Historic seaside town, I can see myself amused the first time but getting annoyed by #2). What I do take issue with is the faux-compliance and hoping that asking you to drop a standard enough will finally wear you down into giving in.

 

I like the respectful environment our sandbox has, and it is crucial that that respect always goes both ways.

  • Agree 3

By Wit & Whitby

[Plot] | [Rules] | [Wanted] | [Discord]

18+ | Victorian Era | No App | No Word Count |

PoC & LGBT-friendly | Newbie-friendly
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think you should do what you suggested and tell them this isn't the site for them - but I would say, be as gentle as possible. I was never an "extensive modifications required" player, but I did use to be a "ghosts and comes back" player. It was my anxiety disorder screwing with me. And you've got nothing to lose by assuming that the player has good intentions and is just flaky. 

  • Agree 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

This sounds very irritating. I’m not the most patient person. I guess I’ve been lucky that I’ve never encountered someone like this before. Usually it’s we ask them to change a couple of things, they do it, and if we are satisfied we slap an accepted code on it and move on. However this person... they seem to be a whole other level of complicated. I think there is a certain point where you have to tell a person that they aren’t a right fit for the site and wish them luck. It seems a little mean, but it’s true. Not every site is right for everybody. So I think if they come back and try to drop a character and pick up another it might be in your best interest and in your sites best interest that you tell them that they need to hit the road. I think that as admins we forget that we can tell people that. I hope this helps. 

spacer.png

 

Will you be another face in the night? 

 

18+ | 333 Rating | No Word Count | No Activity Check | Diverse Species 

 

Home | Plot | Rules | Species | Claims | Site Trailer

Link to comment
Share on other sites

i'm echoing all the others on this thread at this point, but i agree that it's not out of the question for you to politely tell them they might not be the best fit. it makes sense that you want people who are going to create characters and actually be active on your site; how else can you grow and actually get some good plots going? if you're feeling bad about that, though, you could give them the option of, "if you still really want to take part in this role-play, you can always stick with your current character and try to get muse going for them again" etc etc. this person just sounds like they're a bit more trouble than they're worth especially if they're not really contributing anything of value to your site—and being a huge time suck (it sounds like, with all the revisions and back-and-forth) to boot!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...

Honestly. They are more trouble than they seem worth. A member can make a mistake, they happen. But, for someone to continue not to learn from what you're telling them they've done wrong is a red flag. It's a clear sign they just aren't listening to you. Whilst yes there might be factors involved, constant mistakes despite being told is extra work for you/staff. You have to continue to babysit them through their apps and their activity. I would just stop trying. I know a rule for app review can be helpful, the sort that say "we will review an app for edits 3 times, if the app isn't suitably edited after this point we reserve the right to deny it". In addition, definitely enforce the activity rule in future. If a member drops a character you can say they must wait 30 days to make another one. They cannot make a character if they failed the activity check or are on a absense to avoid meeting the AC requirements.

 

You can apply any sort of activity requirement for new characters. Or, enforce specific ones for flakey members who drop and keep characters like a yoyo. It might be on a case-by-case situation. That, for this member "due to your noticeable pattern in character making and dropping, we will have to insist you do not apply for any further character for a 60 day period. If you drop any other characters after this period we reserve the right to deny you any future applications". You can just flat out deny them any more characters until they have shown they can avoid the flakey behaviour for a time period, or say you no longer feel this site is suitable for them. Wish them well elsewhere, and let them know you will be archiving them and no longer accepting them on the site. You can say their behaviour with activity and apps causes extra work for the staff and becomes a pain for members who won't know how reliable they are to post with due to their constant character switching/dropping. It's unfair for the site and community, so goodbye. 

  • Preach it! 1

spacer.png
 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
 Share

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use, Guidelines and Privacy Policy. We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.