When you roleplay, is your focus on story or relationships?

[Grimscythe 181]

One of the things I've noticed over my years roleplaying is a focus on character relationships of a romantic nature. I've encountered players whose sole interest is to write about lovers as they traverse whatever world they are in. In this thread an anonymous user mentions their struggles with enticing players to their sites when they create more female characters than male. Though my reply was short, it reminded me that maybe I am missing a part of roleplay that I once enjoyed.

 

Normally I focus on story. Before I switched to forum roleplay, I was an avid roleplayer on a php MUD. My replies typically took about three minutes to post and most of the time, I sat online and did... nothing. The players around me, aside from a couple other old-timers on the site (it was launched in '98 and I'd played since 2003), were more focused on the romantic aspects of their stories than anything else, even friendship.

 

I can't pretend that I made it easy for the character I wrote to be loved. I'll likely discuss that character more in depth as I work on my blogs, but let's just put it this way: she became a major villain before I stepped away from the site. She was considered one of the most powerful necromancers, and had a rather dark influence over those around her. 

 

Because of this cold, unlovable character, I often spent time scrolling through the list of online players hoping that I might get roleplay. Newer players are hard to come by in that type of game, especially as of late with most moving to Discord or forum roleplay instead. (They also suffer from a major lack of advertisement, as the actual owner of the site no longer plays himself. Instead, he hosts it and updates are few and far between to the code.) Getting newer players involved in arcs proved nearly impossible on my end, and though there was some interest, it didn't last. I couldn't get players to write with me and advance the arc.

 

This wasn't the first time I experienced this with my characters on sites over the years. Another php MUD allowed us to have multiple characters, and there my characters were often shunned. I admit that I haven't tried to play many males over the years, but that's something I've been working on (including a sexy man over in post-apocalyptic Metro). 

 

At one point, I played more than thirty characters actively, and none of them were in a ship. I've found that I often encounter roleplayers that seem entirely uninterested, despite leading me and my characters on. (I actually got into an argument with someone about this once, and how it wasn't cool of them to promise an OTP and then tell me they were killing the character.)

 

There's a lot more to that story, but what I'm trying to get at is this: I've come to a point in my life where I'm not entirely sure what I want when it comes to roleplay. My question here is whether you prefer to base your roleplay around romance or story. I'd also like to know why you prefer your roleplay that way. 

[Veino 26]

Definitely story, all the way. Especially short term arcs and worldbuilding driven narratives. I don’t think I’ve ever had any characters in any sort of romantic entanglement (and not because I mainly write Jedi, either 😆), even on the board where I’ve been writing since 2013. 
 

Not sure why. But romantic rp writing has never really appealed to me. 

[Grimscythe 181]

1 minute ago, Veino said:

Definitely story, all the way. Especially short term arcs and worldbuilding driven narratives. I don’t think I’ve ever had any characters in any sort of romantic entanglement (and not because I mainly write Jedi, either 😆), even on the board where I’ve been writing since 2013. 
 

Not sure why. But romantic rp writing has never really appealed to me. 

 

See, I feel similarly in most regards. However, I won't object to it if crops up (in most circumstances, anyway). I love to watch the development of story, even if it ends in tragedy and I'm notorious among my old roleplay friends for ruining my characters lives and relationships. In hindsight, that could also be a deterrent. I don't like the idea of changing how my characters are, who they are, in order to find a OTP. Although, I did have one relationship that lasted approximately ten years (2006 to 2016ish, where things got really rocky).

[MorriganLFae 12]

I have had some of the best RP relationships come from stories in which the two characters essentially loathed each other at first.  It has only added to the character development now, and adds extra things for the characters to consider in the situations that they find themselves in down the road.  I think to just focus for romance can sometimes force characters, and I have found it can kill my muse hard.  So...just thought I would add my two cents! 🙂

[Grimscythe 181]

 

34 minutes ago, MorriganLFae said:

I have had some of the best RP relationships come from stories in which the two characters essentially loathed each other at first.  It has only added to the character development now, and adds extra things for the characters to consider in the situations that they find themselves in down the road.  I think to just focus for romance can sometimes force characters, and I have found it can kill my muse hard.  So...just thought I would add my two cents! 🙂data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAPABAP///wAAACH5BAEKAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAICRAEAOw==

 

I certainly agree on that front. I know I have tried the whole planned relationship thing, even with close rp friends, and it just didn't work most of the time. Granted, I think in the 17 years I've been rping, I've only had two characters that ended up with their happy-ever-after, and one of them felt so forced. One of them, I felt like I had to drag the player into finishing the roleplay, and then I ended up dropping the character afterward because I lost all interest in it.

[Arceus 1,081]

Both, actually. I don't feel like one of these automatically precludes the other or means that you can't think about the other to any sort of depth. Often, the two go hand-in-hand for me, too. It's much the same as with close friendships and family relationships; a lot of a character's personal story-line will depend heavily on, or be extremely influenced by, the people they spend their time around. In cases of certain characters it's turned out such that their relationship with someone was a driving force behind the way their story went, for one reason or another. I also find, a lot of the time, that my ships (be they romantic or otherwise) spawn my stories and the stories spawn the ships.

 

So yeah, TLDR I guess, I don't think these are necessarily two different things and shouldn't necessarily be automatically treated as such. I get people that don't want to think too hard about one or the other, or those who have characters for whom one doesn't make any sense, but I think ultimately you're gonna have the best mileage combining the two in some way, rather than focusing too hard on one or the other.

[Grimscythe 181]

1 minute ago, Arceus said:

Both, actually. I don't feel like one of these automatically precludes the other or means that you can't think about the other to any sort of depth. Often, the two go hand-in-hand for me, too. It's much the same as with close friendships and family relationships; a lot of a character's personal story-line will depend heavily on, or be extremely influenced by, the people they spend their time around. In cases of certain characters it's turned out such that their relationship with someone was a driving force behind the way their story went, for one reason or another. I also find, a lot of the time, that my ships (be they romantic or otherwise) spawn my stories and the stories spawn the ships.

 

So yeah, TLDR I guess, I don't think these are necessarily two different things and shouldn't necessarily be automatically treated as such. I get people that don't want to think too hard about one or the other, or those who have characters for whom one doesn't make any sense, but I think ultimately you're gonna have the best mileage combining the two in some way, rather than focusing too hard on one or the other.

 

That's a very valid point, actually. I added that as an option, since it didn't occur to me when I wrote the post.

[jadbaz 30]

I have always said to people I prefer for relationships to come about organically! If they happen, they happen and that's great and I enjoy them as they do. That isn't to say that I don't plot ships too but they've got to be more than "and they lived happily ever after", give me some rocks, throw spanners in the works, have their relationship be more than just the "relationship" with some tricky dynamics of some sort to keep me interested!

[ClutchRoadagain 4]

I think that they go hand in hand when done well. Sometimes a story leads into a relationship, and the same applies to the vice versa. A good relationship can lead into a story.

[sohvi 22]

I am a shipper at heart and always posting that ProZD "oh they fuckin" video on discord when two characters do literally anything, but... I still do not actively seek out romance plots. They just occasionally fall into my lap when someone's writing and character meshes well with mine.

 

So I think ultimately I belong in the group of people who do not see shipping and story as two different things, but instead complementary, the presence of both improving literally everything else that is happening. 

[Yume 99]

I definitely second the both are very important to me, this is partially because like... they affect each other. How the world story is going affects how characters interact with each other, and those interactions shape relationships of all types. I certainly understand leaning on relationships instead of a larger plot, sort of coffee shop like or something like that. But... yeah I don't really get into doing doing one without the other to some extent at least.

 

I do generally prefer relationships to crop up as we go, rather than planning them out, unless I know the partner very well and we know how the characters are going to work. ... too often it feels like forcing it otherwise. 

[Prophetess 137]

I'm more story driven than driven by finding romance for my characters. (reactive writing) I enjoy a good organic relationship that forms over time with plenty of story to it as well. Character development comes from stories and the world around them. So the story is what I crave. A really good story will keep my attention far more than just a happily ever after. So both to a degree but more to the story side of things.

[Elena 546]

I think both, with focus on story and relationships for character development. But relationships can help story too - a friend who happen to be able to help when freeing a prisoner from the fortress, or a lover to be taken hostage...

[planet 1]

I prefer story based elements,  but if chances for a relationship pops up, I'm not gonna miss out on it!! 😄

[August. 1]

I don't mind discussing ships but I really need to make sure that the story is there. So story first, ship second.