Stuck in a rut

[Minx 29]

So typically my characters tend to drive their own stories but I've been having a problem with one that is especially dear to my heart. He is a sixteen year old boy who went through a horrible break up with his first girlfriend, who left him for her ex and then left school entirely. That entire part of the storyline wasn't really my idea nor did I feel comfortable writing it but I went along with it anyway because I wanted to make my friend happy and I didn't want to tie her up in a storyline that she suddenly didn't want to be in. There was also other drama at play that I won't get into here. Anyway, it made it difficult to play this character both during and after the drama resolved. Now I'm in a bit of a rut without being able to snap him out of it.

 

I have other friends who have suggested potential storylines to sort of give the character back some of his confidence and hopefully to get me writing him more again (he used to be pretty much my main character) which I appreciate 110% but he has no motivation to get involved. I don't want to knock him down to an NPC and I've been playing my other characters more but I miss him. Have you guys ever been in a situation like this? Is there anything you specifically did to break the cycle and get back to it? 

[Deacon Frost 196]

I've had it happen to me. Sometimes the answer is to let the character rest a while. Depression is just as natural for a character as it is for a player. Write a few angsty lit posts using way to many Linkin Park lyrics, have him mope in his room, dye his hair black and get an eyebrow piercing. 

 

Then maybe he'd snap out of it and suddenly have fun after a naturally stimulating moment occurs. 

 

But, you could also just keep throwing him out of his comfort zone and see what happens. The problem with that part is that if you try to force him to go where he doesn't want to go, you could snap the character's sense of self. Its a tricky situation. 

But, don't give up on a character.  A lot of time they just need a little rest and some TLC

[NyxDarklore 92]

Sometimes when you write a character, plots and events happen that you don't control; that is part of the joy (and heartache and frustration) of roleplaying. Breakups are something that happen in life, and if this is a character that you enjoy playing and want to play then you should take that as an opportunity to grow and develop the character. Really, whether or not this character gets knocked down to an NPC depends 100% on your ability (and desire) as a writer to take something unexpected that you didn't necessarily like or anticipate for his story and roll with it, using it as fuel to push your character forward.

 

That's the nature of this hobby and something I've experienced over the years.

 

Sometimes, that means taking a little bit of time and putting the character aside for a couple of weeks or months (I've done it for years before) and then either picking up at a point in the future after they've moved past the event (using it to shape a backstory instead of their current plot) or at the point when it's just happened and working them through it. Which option you go for depends entirely on what story is more compelling for the character themselves (and the easiest to play out). Taking a little bit of time to reevaluate where they are at as a result of such a plot overhaul is not a bad thing.

 

Based on the little information you've provided, it sounds like the in character event is only part of what's causing this block, however. Your words and reading between the lines suggest that a] the other associated drama is a bit of an issue and b] you might simply have overused this character to the point that there's not much more to tell right now. Both of those things are okay, but if you want to keep playing the character then the solution in both cases is to find plots you like and stories you want to tell, to work through some of the issues and write a few awful posts to bring him out on the other side.

 

This happens to everyone, although not always in the same manner it happened to you, and you really have two choices: write them or don't write them. There's no in between and there isn't a right answer either. I have characters that I've put on the bench and they've remained there for the last ten years or so, I have others who are back in rotation and others who have never left, it all comes down to personal preference.

[In Red 16]

Its definitely okay to take a break. This sort of thing has happened to me before and I've shelved one character because of it, and taken a break from another (and ultimately been able to continue on) so I understand to some degree what this feels like, and it can be rouuuuugh. 

 

Just to check in with yourself though, you mentioned that he has no motivation to get involved in potential plots, is it truly his motivation or is it yours? Thinking about if that lack of motivation is IC (because of depression or what have you) or OOC (because you feel a bit burned), might help to decide if you do need a break from them or not. I might be wrong but it sounds more like its your motivation that is lacking (for totally valid reasons!) more so than the character, as it should be much easier to RP him if those plots and things excited you. This isn't something to feel guilty about either way, and you shouldn't feel bad about not taking your friends up on their plot offers. 

 

Is there a time limit in your community as far as how long you can get away with not being active with him? Is there a way to apply for more time to work through this? Regardless of what you ultimately do, I think making the decision actively to take a break would be beneficial so that while you're not playing him you aren't feeling guilty about not playing him (if that even makes sense, what are words).  Afterwards, if you do feel like jumping back in you could potentially pull a Bella-Swan-in-New-Moon-four-blank-pages move, rather than focus specifically on getting imbedded in those feels if that headspace is not a place you are comfortable in.

 

Beyond that, here's a thought experiment for you to try that might help you figure things out. Imagine you've created him as a brand new character, and all those things that happened to this character are now background and backstory.  This is where you're BEGINNING this character, in this thought experiment. If you were doing that, what kind of plots would you theoretically be looking for? What kinds of goals would you have for the character? If there's anything interesting that sparks from a brainstorming session like that (and I totally recommend making a playlist full of all the angsty songs to get right in the spirit of things), then that might just be your in to getting him back into things. 

 

Good luck and be kind to yourself.

[Minx 29]

On 4/6/2021 at 6:28 PM, BlackPhoenix said:

Sometimes, that means taking a little bit of time and putting the character aside for a couple of weeks or months (I've done it for years before) and then either picking up at a point in the future after they've moved past the event (using it to shape a backstory instead of their current plot) or at the point when it's just happened and working them through it. Which option you go for depends entirely on what story is more compelling for the character themselves (and the easiest to play out). Taking a little bit of time to reevaluate where they are at as a result of such a plot overhaul is not a bad thing.

 

Thank you for your kind words and reaffirmation that it's ok to take a break from a character, especially when they are so close to my heart. I don't plan on giving up on him.

 

2 hours ago, In Red said:

Beyond that, here's a thought experiment for you to try that might help you figure things out. Imagine you've created him as a brand new character, and all those things that happened to this character are now background and backstory.  This is where you're BEGINNING this character, in this thought experiment. If you were doing that, what kind of plots would you theoretically be looking for? What kinds of goals would you have for the character? If there's anything interesting that sparks from a brainstorming session like that (and I totally recommend making a playlist full of all the angsty songs to get right in the spirit of things), then that might just be your in to getting him back into things. 

I think this is just the idea that I needed to hear. I do have a tendency to hyperfocus on a problem instead of looking at it from outside the box. I'll give this a shot and see what shakes loose. I think another part of it is that yes he's depressed which is a little hard to write because I deal with depression on a daily basis and I already had one of my other characters go through some heavy stuff around the same time this was happening. I want to pull him through it though so this might just be the ticket.

[Keaton 133]

13 hours ago, In Red said:

Beyond that, here's a thought experiment for you to try that might help you figure things out. Imagine you've created him as a brand new character, and all those things that happened to this character are now background and backstory.  This is where you're BEGINNING this character, in this thought experiment. If you were doing that, what kind of plots would you theoretically be looking for? What kinds of goals would you have for the character? If there's anything interesting that sparks from a brainstorming session like that (and I totally recommend making a playlist full of all the angsty songs to get right in the spirit of things), then that might just be your in to getting him back into things. 

 

This is probably the best suggestion I've ever seen for confronting this particular issue. There have been a few times in the past where I wish I'd had this advice. Very simple but powerful, and not necessarily obvious when you've been playing a character for a long time — It can be tough to get your head around a big change so you can approach things differently. Thanks for sharing. I'm very glad to have this in my toolbox as both a player and admin.