Uaithne

 Membership What do you want your admin to know about you?

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What, ideally, would you like people to know about you when you join a site?

 

This can be literally anything, from something that is acceptable to know (ex: "I have a busy schedule") to something you probably wouldn't tell people upon first meeting them (ex: "I'm chronically ill and it interferes with my schedule") or things that aren't deemed acceptable (ex: "I really just don't like some people and want to play only with a specific person").  It's kind of like what you'd like people to magically read your mind and know without judging you so that they can provide you all of the comforts you need.

 

Personally, I'd like people to know that sometimes I get really anxious about sites and get overwhelmed and disappear not because I don't like them but because I can't always face them again, especially if I've been gone for awhile.  I'd also like people to know that sometimes I get bored of sites and while I'm sorry about it, that's how it is.

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I totally agree! Sometimes these things are not things I personally tell Admin about myself unless it's serious problem with another player that affects the game (canon breaking, insulting etc). I'm lucky in that my illness presents itself as an extra need for bed-rest so I end up getting in more playtime, therefore I very rarely admit my own personal life in that regard. (I'm sick, I get more playtime. yay? - sounds too much like complain-bragging and I want none of that).

 

However - we keep a chat on Slack, and are all very open about our lives and even the minor stresses we deal with from day-to-day as friends with family or work. Not everyone is like that, but I enjoy that we have a space where people feel comfortable enough to be themselves! 

 

As an Admin, I wish my players would tell me anything and everything they are comfortable with sharing with me. It can be anything! Personal life details all the way down to nit-picky issues with layout or plot in the site. I am here to curate the world we are creating and make sure that it's as fun, welcoming, as accessible, and easy to play with as possible. For me, my responsibilities don't end at just the game. My players are important to me and so are their lives!

 

I especially like knowing when players are going for a prolonged absence so I don't end up archiving their characters right before they intend to come back, although I don't need a reason why, it's fine just to say "I'm leaving for a while." I also really appreciate when players tell me that they are leaving for good so that they can tell me what to do with their characters. Some people prefer not to NPC their characters, so when people get bored with the site and want to leave, I really love hearing from them.

 

So for me - it sounds like you're telling your admin exactly enough!

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As a member, I want admins to know that I have a busy schedule and I'm easily distracted. Like, I know I said I would be online to post, but I got distracted with some surprise yard work (i.e. my dad came over and had dedicated himself to redoing my landscaping so I have to help). I tend to make promises like this all the time with 100% intent to follow through and be online to plot or post or whatnot! But I get surprised a lot by the people in my life, so I can seem kind of flaky online and that sucks and I'm sorry. It's not personal.

 

I'm also not a huge chatter. I can't multitask, and when I'm writing a post I need to be 100% dedicated to that post or else it doesn't get posted. So I may be "online" or you may see my name in the active users list, but that doesn't always mean I'm available to chit chat. And I find that a lot of people take that personally. I can't churn out posts a mile a minute - it takes me a while! So please be patient with me while I formulate a coherent reply to our thread. At the same time though, I do want to be social and pay attention to you, so it's a hard struggle for me to balance. 

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What I'd probably say is that I'm very interpersonally driven and if I get the impression that I'm not liked or even that nobody particularly wants to write with me I'll probably float away like a ghost. I've had things happen where an admin just isn't understanding of me being me and I feel unwanted right off the bat.

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I make a point to let people know I work weird (and long) hours and do other things so I'm ridiculously slow. Beyond that, other stuff might be found out but I don't feel the need to tell them unless its appropriate for the situation.

 

Though, I have let some know in the past that I can be a raging asshole and so and so is pissing me off and I'm trying very hard to bite my tongue. Fair warning or something.

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Well to put it bluntly; I'm not a good person. I put things like personal tasks over site tasks and I usually ignore things if they aren't shoved in my face. I can also be quite insensitive to other people's problems...partially because when I try to care it comes off as condescending, and when I don't "try" to care it comes off as bitchy. So yeah. I'm just a toxic member and you should probably ban me before I hog all the plots.

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As an introvert, I tend not to be one of those people who chats all the time, or make connections with people easily. (If I feel I'm being rejected, then I with-draw even more and become more of a recluse because it takes a lot for me to approach people in the first place.)

 

Various medical conditions and duties as a carer mean that I don't always get to post when I want to. Forum posting is different to twitter, where I need to take more care over what I post so my concentration needs to be high for me to write them. (Right now, is one of those bad times, so I'm more withdrawn than I usually am because I don't have the energy to take on extra stuff. I'm working on long-neglected playable character and npc profiles right now as it's all I can do.)

 

Finally, I'm only interested in talking about fandom related things on a forum. I'm not interested in discussing politics, religion, or events like the recent terror attacks in Manchester and London because a rp site is meant to be an escape from that. Talking about other fandoms, pets, music, is fine.

Edited by Icewolf

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I'd also like to know if there are some people who don't want the admin to know a single thing about them (even if there were no negative repercussions to having the admin know).

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I think I lean more toward the “don’t need to know a single thing” side, especially if I am brand new to a site. I'm just more of a private person. I love to chat with people and share superficial stories, but I don’t tend to offer up personal information or issues unless it is asked directly.

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I'm kind of like Firefly (idk how to do the pretty name thing, I'm sorry;; ). My real life and my online life are two very separate areas, and until I'm REALLY good friends with someone, I generally try to keep them from overlapping. I will share random amusing tidbits about my day if it fits the conversation, make silly jokes, flirt outrageously, whatever. When I'm comfortable, I can be very chatty. But other than that, my personal life is personal. 

 

Admins on new sites I join (pretty rare honestly) need to know that I'm interested, I'm a shy plotter, and I sometimes vanish into video games but will return, cross my heart. And that's it.

 

My current admin is an exception, cuz I've known her like, seven years now <3 

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My hard and fast rule for any and every game is my real life =/= my rp life. Beyond the usual of "I work and school so might be slow", admins do not need to know anything about me. They also shouldn't be asking for more information than I have given them. Nosy admins who must know everything will make me leave with no explanation beyond a simple "I'm out". My personal life isn't any of their business. 

 

I do, however, make an exception for a few current admins, Rune being one simply because I've known her for literally years. I consider her and the rest of CWs admins (whom I've also known for years) to be personal friends. They'll get more information about my life and they're part of a very small group. That's pretty much the only reason I'll give over information to an admin outside the usual information.

Edited by jenneral_jennson
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I have a GIGANTIC mouth and tend to spill WAY to much information about myself to staff, members, anyone who will listen. Lol. There are some things I find important people know. For one I have severe nerve damage, I'm disabled, and that can potentially mean rapid and unforeseen declines in my health. Which can potentially mean I won't have a chance to be like "Hey, need a break". Another is that I'm the single mother of THREE young children, which should be obvious to anyone who knows kids. I cannot be on a forum twenty-four seven. Heck, sometimes it might be a day or two before I even log in. This is just something that happens...I have kids, they need me more than your roleplay does. Sorry not sorry.

 

Another thing is I do sometimes just lose interest in an RP. I can't help it.  I feel like this can be a combination of things. Lack of roleplay, maybe. Lack of events and staff involvement in the forum can be another thing. Sometimes I feel a plot definitely suits me, but than I get active into that plot and find out it's not as interesting as I had originally thought. Maybe I'm being paranoid and not feeling welcome by the members...which does happen in some places to a lot of people due to the fact that sometimes most of the existing member base are already very good friends and it can sometimes cause me to shy off...not that they do it on purpose, but it does happen. 

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I am loyal, reliable and dedicated. I don;t change my mind on plots unilaterally, and I am a planner, I can't do no direction/ no timeline. I am writing a coherent story, avoiding inconsistencies.

 

I always say directly what I mean. I don't take hints, I need to be told in plain English what's the point.  And no slang either, because sometimes I don't understand that I don't understand. (I have just learnt that there is an expression "wool gathering = day dreaming". My character saw the other actually gathering wool in that thread, because I had no idea. Also I didn't know, 2 years ago, that "I am good"= "I finished". I knew only end/ over/completed. So when I asked a question about ending a thread and someone replied "I am good", I had no idea that the reply was directed to me, as I interpreted it as "I am a good girl". Three questions later, each time followed by the same reply, of course I bursted, "No, you are not good, you are bad because you don't reply to my question, how many times should I ask it again?")

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So this isn't really a what I want the admins to know about me since I'm only on one site and I'm an admin there, but what I wish the members would understand about me. 

 

For some reason, I've garnered the reputation of the "mean or bitchy" admin. And I can't find any other reason for this other than the fact that between the two admins we have I'm the admin that knows the most about canon so questions will get deferred to me and I have to say no to something somewhat often. What I wish people would know is that I'm not a bitch (well, at least not most of the time) but what I mean is I don't say no to be a bitch. I say it because of the lore we have on the site. 

 

I always try to go out of my way to help someone make an idea they have work when it doesn't fit the site exactly. To the point where I will do research and writeups for these things. It just kind of sucks sometimes to be seen as the mean scary admin when I don't want to me. 

 

So I guess I just wish the members knew that I'm not some mean scary admin lady that will sweep fro the sky like a dragon and breathe fire on all their hopes and dreams. >.>

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