Jump to content

Thanks


Uaithne
 Share

Recommended Posts

  • Admin

Thank you! That is our goal here on the Initiative and strive to keep that in mind with the decisions we make and how we enforce our community rules. So we really appreciate that it's paying off. <33

  • I read this! 1
  • Love 2

0_mainsignature.jpg

image.png

Profile set made by myself and original Artwork by Fae Merriman, my daughter.

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Some time ago I heard the expression:

"Everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about."

 

And I think that's a very fitting thing in this instance.

What that battle is varies. Everyone has their own issues and problems, no one is special in that regard. Some people have mental health issues, others have chronic illnesses, some have debt, others have shitty parents, others have substance use issues, the list goes on. No one side/group/collective has it better. And it's important that we remember that we all have issues and that not get so focused on our own issues and put them above and beyond what others may be dealing with. 

 

Spoiler

For more examples...

 

Some women say men have it better. But they don't realise that: men make up 95% of workplace fatalities, men are 80% of the suicide victims, serve 60% longer sentences for same crimes, and face extreme prejudice in any family court.

And yeah, they have it so good.

 

On the other side, men sometimes say women have it so easy... But they don't realise: that the sisterhood is a lie (women tear each other apart mercilessly, not as much building up/supporting as it seems like), that women are held to crazy beauty standards (and what those standards are and how high the physical toll is), that in some parts of the world women are still treated like property, just how bad periods can be, how difficult it can be to get proper medical diagnosis for issues (many issues being attributed to PMS).

 

So yeah, both sides have issues. Different issues for certain, but no less valid.

 

Regarding other roleplay related communities... I've found that for the most part they're too influenced by tumblr/social justice "thinking" (and I use the word thinking very loosely because it isn't so much thinking as accepting and repeating a message.)

 

I'm tired of trying to have discussions there only for them to ignore what is actually being said. Or in some cases to have them shift the discussion to avoid actually having a talk about an issue. Or worse deciding that because you don't agree with them that you're simply a misogynistic shitlord. (No, disagreement with a particular woman is not hatred of all women. Don't conflate the two. Actually, let me go one step further, it's entirely possible to hate one woman and yet still not be a misogynist.) I've seen it time and again that if you don't fully agree then you're basically a nazi.

You're either with them or against them. There is no middle ground. It's very much like a certain ex-jedi...

Edited by VirusZero
  • I read this! 3
  • Agree 3
  • Preach it! 1
"There are three sides to every story... Your side, their side, and then somewhere in the middle is the truth."
Link to comment
Share on other sites

@VirusZero, its not uncommon for any community--online or offline--to turn into a cluster of people who just agree with each other and don't allow room for people who think otherwise.  Be it so-called "social justice warriors" or their highly-conservative counterparts, or people who are die-hard fans of a specific sports team, etc., any time you get like-minded people together, you're going to eventually have trouble because people fall into a pattern of "I say something, everyone agrees."  Those who willingly immerse themselves in this culture and refuse to listen to the thoughts and opinions of others because it's not what they want to hear are seriously doing themselves a disservice.  It's hard when it comes to something like roleplay because you want to be in a place that's comfortable for you, but if you don't open yourself up to interacting with people of different backgrounds and thoughts, you're not really growing as a person, and you risk alienating someone who might be really awesome but who happens to disagree with you on one point.

 

I feel like, unfortunately, these words might fall on deaf ears at some places--roleplay and non-roleplay--which is why I'm grateful to RPG Initiative.  I strive to find balance between falling back into what is comfortable and "safe" and exploring things that are new and a little scary.  This is how I become a better writer and a better person.  I've had so many "Wow, so that's why you do that" moments once I get to know people a little better, and the narrow-mindedness of surrounding yourself with only those who agree with you eliminates these moments from your life.  Agree or disagree with people, it doesn't matter; knowing why they make the decisions they do is sometimes fascinating.

 

Of course, there's always the risk of swinging things too far and saying that "All ideas are accepted here--everyone is free to say whatever they want!" and then you end up with people politely saying horrible things to each other.  Its a delicate balance, and it won't always be perfect, but I hope that RPG Initiative doesn't lose what it has as time goes on.

  • I read this! 2
  • Love 1
  • Preach it! 1

WoL___dark01.png

Link to comment
Share on other sites

That is exactly the reason I like this place so much.  Other forums can be less accepting of different views and when you say something that is the opposite of what someone else thinks there then they think you are attacking them.

  • I read this! 5
  • Agree 1
  • Love 1

Profile graphics by @Lirschen

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I agree with all that has been said above. This is the only directory I've come across where ALL opinions are accepted, rather than a core group of veterans becoming some relentless hive mind which you have to agree with or be shunned forever.

 

I don't know what it is, but whether people agree, disagree or whatever, nothing here ever feels hostile. It's just chill as hell. :D

  • I read this! 2
  • Agree 1
  • Thank you 1
  • LOL 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...
  • Contributions Mod

Speaking of which, I was on another resource site, gave an opinion, and got a aggressive response from a staff member. The argument was that I was factually wrong because their particular branch of feminism states their opinion is right. My anxiety went through the roof to the point where I felt like I was going to throw up (I even grabbed a bucket). Seeing all the “thanks” this staff member got from other members made it worse. I just did my best to tip toe out of it as I had and have no interest in picking a fight.

 

It seems like other places are doing a good job at scaring people away. I showed another person, who used to be staff on this site, and she thought it was hostile. I felt a lot better. Seems if I want to go over to this place, I’ll need to use liberal amounts of the ignore feature for my own sanity.

 

I think I’ll mostly hang out over here where I don’t have to deal with stuff like that. Thank you staff at The Initiative. Keep being chill.

  • I read this! 2
  • You're Welcome 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hive mind. lmao I nearly spit my coffee out.

 

 

I'd just like to add: I love you all. It's been amazing being able to contribute to a community that is TRULY accepting, and united through a common interest no matter what we may individually disagree on.

  • Love 1

 

OnyxSiggy1.jpg.c76f2c1acc64a865bdf5164f4c085020.jpg

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Mistress Of The Obvious said:

Speaking of which, I was on another resource site, gave an opinion, and got a aggressive response from a staff member. The argument was that I was factually wrong because their particular branch of feminism states their opinion is right. My anxiety went through the roof to the point where I felt like I was going to throw up (I even grabbed a bucket). Seeing all the “thanks” this staff member got from other members made it worse. I just did my best to tip toe out of it as I had and have no interest in picking a fight.

 

It seems like other places are doing a good job at scaring people away. I showed another person, who used to be staff on this site, and she thought it was hostile. I felt a lot better. Seems if I want to go over to this place, I’ll need to use liberal amounts of the ignore feature for my own sanity.

 

I think I’ll mostly hang out over here where I don’t have to deal with stuff like that. Thank you staff at The Initiative. Keep being chill.

 

idk if this helps at all but I linger around other resource sites and rarely interject my opinion for reasons like this, but I do believe I saw this particular exchange and thought it was actually pretty shitty on the staff's part to react like they did. I haven't been all too impressed by the atmosphere on other resource sites lately.

 

So yeah. Thank you to the Initiative to being on point. :)

  • I read this! 2
  • Love 1
  • You're Welcome 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I can confirm that as someone who used to be a staff member of a large resource site that it puts you in a bit of a spotlight and people have a tendency to follow you and agree with you more, pending, of course, the overall attitude of the site. You have people patting you on the back and disagreeing with those who disagree with you, so you end up building yourself up with confidence that what you're doing is "right" and opposing opinions are "wrong." It's really when things are reverse that you get a bit of a shock.

 

It's the lessons I've learned that make me realize that I don't WANT to be surrounded purely by people who agree with me, nor do I want the discomfort of trying to voice my opinion in a room of people who shut me down because I don't have the exact same opinions. There is a balance, and what's more than that, there is an opportunity to explain and explore and learn when people are open to hearing both sides.

 

It also helps to have the diverse "like" button options that we do on RPG Initiative. I sometimes find myself liking posts that I don't agree with because I like the way they explained their thoughts or stood up for themselves or explained something new to me. In this way, it doesn't look quite the same when someone piles on the "likes" or "thanks" or what have you because you can see that people appreciated the post for different reasons. It deceases the likelihood of the hive mind (at least in my opinion) and allows people to show their thoughts more concisely. (Though I still have yet to figure out what the Moana man symbol is supposed to represent.)

 

Through the years, I've come to appreciate that I don't need to like everything or everyone, and that's okay.

  • I read this! 2
  • Agree 1
  • Love 1
  • You're Welcome 1
  • Preach it! 1

WoL___dark01.png

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Admin

It's supposed to be "You're welcome" there is a bug with it at the moment apparently.

 

Edit: I fixed it.

  • You're Welcome 1

0_mainsignature.jpg

image.png

Profile set made by myself and original Artwork by Fae Merriman, my daughter.

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I literally came to this specific thread a couple of days ago because I was reading a thread elsewhere that was just a cesspit. There was no real dialogue, just a bunch of people who believed they were right and wanted all the naysayers to fall into line and admit they were wrong.

 

It made me grumpy XD but I came here and read the nice things being said to make myself feel better. 

  • I read this! 2
  • Agree 1
  • Love 2

 

sig.png.30b42565d04d922988370bf14e1447bc.png

PSI: an Occult Investigations RP

Roleplay Architects: Grab a friend (or many friends!) and just write.

You can also find me at:

static-historicalrp.jpg  B8CB4x.png rpabutton.png

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Contributions Mod
On 6/23/2017 at 11:33 AM, Gina said:

 

idk if this helps at all but I linger around other resource sites and rarely interject my opinion for reasons like this, but I do believe I saw this particular exchange and thought it was actually pretty shitty on the staff's part to react like they did. I haven't been all too impressed by the atmosphere on other resource sites lately.

 

So yeah. Thank you to the Initiative to being on point. :)

 

Just brief rundown for those who didn't see like Gina did. To get a better idea what happened and my mindset is what the subject was about. I was critical about exclusionary safe spaces because they're exclusionary. It increases the likelihood of trolling, brigarding, as well as the danger of said space being poisoned within because the blame can always be placed theoretically on the excluded group for bad behavior when that might not be the case. Pretty simple.

 

The fact that I got such a hostile response by said staff member, automatically I interpreted it as the person seeing something I said as somehow threatening. Hostile responses are usually defensive in nature. I saw it as an attempt to shut me down. The fact that they received accolades from other users (mostly because this person had the right political views), that this person and another proceeded to actively fight anyone else who remotely disagreed with them in the thread, effectively shutting down any conversation, and that other staff participated in this thread but as far as I can tell never issued these people warning, is what really freaked me out.

 

What it told me is that abusive people were likely on as staff of this particular site and that they and general members will be allowed to abuse others so long as it fits a political narrative or ideology. That's rather terrifying when put in those terms. If it wasn't me being critical about some aspect of social justice, which is popular on this site in question, and just a general topic, I wouldn't have freaked out as much.

 

Thanks, Gina. It seems more people I talk to found the whole exchange rather inappropriate.

 

On 6/23/2017 at 2:51 PM, Uaithne said:

I can confirm that as someone who used to be a staff member of a large resource site that it puts you in a bit of a spotlight and people have a tendency to follow you and agree with you more, pending, of course, the overall attitude of the site. You have people patting you on the back and disagreeing with those who disagree with you, so you end up building yourself up with confidence that what you're doing is "right" and opposing opinions are "wrong." It's really when things are reverse that you get a bit of a shock.

 

 

That seems very high school or middle school girl in activity. It's also quite scary as you as a staff member can simply be giving an honest opinion in disagreement and at best the other person is bombarded with more disagreements and at worst, the "attack dogs" come in. What's a staff member to do, not give an opinion? That's rather silly. Yet doing nothing about these potential groupies (let's just call them what they are), can create mini dictators. How does one police groupies like that? That's an interesting question.

 

With this topic, I've become interested in how to prevent hivemind. I'm thinking there's probably hints in things like business management and/or social behavior books. How communities rise and fall and what we can do to prevent said fall is fascinating subject.

Edited by Mistress Of The Obvious
  • I read this! 1
  • Love 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

@Mistress Of The Obvious this was exactly what made me grumpy and in that thread, I would actually side with the majority (politically, I sit very far to the left). I just really disliked how they conducted themselves and how a genuine dialogue was not being had.

 

And frankly, it's a problem generally. Somewhere along the line, this sort of thing has become about being Right and you must admit that you're Wrong and if you don't you're Scum. It's not appropriate and leads to combative defensiveness that prevents dialogue, compassion and respect. (I have a lot of other Opinions but this is the basis of them all.) 

 

But how to prevent a hive mind....in a community like this one? Just listening I guess. Give positive feedback, even if you don't agree with the opinion. Hit that cookie button. Ask questions to clarify what a person might be trying to express. Add to the dialogue because you can bring something new and different to the table or because you're being misinterpreted. Never write something with the sole intent to change someone's mind. Write to add something to conversation, to express yourself more clearly or to address a factual error. Don't approach it like a debate where you have to convince everyone of something.

 

I dunno, I just feel like compassion and respect is kind of the values we need to hold onto when we're being with other people. 

  • I read this! 1
  • Love 2

 

sig.png.30b42565d04d922988370bf14e1447bc.png

PSI: an Occult Investigations RP

Roleplay Architects: Grab a friend (or many friends!) and just write.

You can also find me at:

static-historicalrp.jpg  B8CB4x.png rpabutton.png

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 5 months later...

The other day somebody found this thread and liked it, which of course notified me automatically.  I re-read the thread. I still agree with what I said, and I appreciate all the things other people said, too.  But I didn't think much about it until I was reading something elsewhere online, and the person was just downright rude.  And I thought about this again. . . .

 

And I thought again about the growth of RPG Initiative, and that we've seen quite a few new members over the past 6 months since I originally wrote this, but the overall atmosphere of the site is the same.  I really look to all the members here so that I can model my own behavior after yours . . . not in the sense of copying people or in swapping saccharine nothings to make people feel better.  But I see people here being respectful to others, and I want to make sure that I can be respectful back without sacrificing the things I want (and need) to say.

 

So thank you for encouraging me not just to be a better roleplayer or writer or administrator, but to be a better person altogether.

  • I read this! 3
  • Love 2

WoL___dark01.png

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
 Share

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use, Guidelines and Privacy Policy. We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.