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Came up in another thread, and I'm curious! To clarify: this thread is about romantic/sexual relationships. Not friendships/platonic relationships.


Do you plot relationships? How do you do it? Do you plot characters as being Meant For Each Other, despite not having met before? Do you make characters specifically to end up with each other? Or do you prefer to play them off each other first before deciding? Do you Decide, or do you just let the story take its course? Do you have relationships that aren't healthy or that aren't intended to be Forever?

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I'm all across the spectrum. So it very much depends on the plot I'm going with.


I will admit (as everyone who knows me knows) I'm a major sucker for romance. But I'm always about the planned plot. I have plots in which the characters will go on forever, plots in which they will break up and become friends, break up and never meet again or become enemies...


And sometimes, the story does not follow the plan, and characters who were meant to be friends end up together and characters who started off together end up parting ways because they just don't work. So I do plot the romantic relationships when the story I'm trying to tell calls for it (and sometimes just because it's fun).

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Shady McShaderson

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I mentioned this probably in the other thread, but I don't really roleplay romantic partnerships.


Part of it is that I like to leave things up to how it plays out during roleplay itself. I cannot and will not pre-plan a "final" because that concept doesn't make sense to me. I would be willing to pre-plan relationships as long as the other party knows that stuff happens and there is a possibility that the characters fall out of love.


Another thing to note is that who the OoC player is may influence whether or not I agree to a relationship with our characters. Not because I can't tell the difference between IC and OoC but because it's a hard enough topic for me to play, and writing style may make all the difference. If it's a light or potentially temporary relationship, I wouldn't be as picky. But if our characters are supposed to be joined at the soul or in tune with each other, I need to be able to feel comfortable and be able to communicate easily. If our characters have a deep emotional bond, I want to actually play a deep relationship between the characters . .  . not sit there wondering how I'm supposed to respond to the other character "glomping" mine like it's an everyday occurrence when it's not something that my character appreciates and doesn't mesh with the personality/history stated in his bio.


So you can see that because I need that extra bit, I'm picky. And it's easier to just not roleplay romantic relationships than it is to figure out how to decline somebody on purely arbitrary, personal reasons that may offend them, especially if they're someone I otherwise like.

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I too work across the whole spectrum. I have one character who while i know which player he is paired with we are parading a list of girls past him to see which thing clicks. I have some who were made for a plot with a specific person and the whole thing was sparked from a random idea... 


A lot of it depends on who I'm plotting with, how well do I know the person i'm playing with, how well have past plots gone? Have we made them compatible on purpose, are we starting in the middle of a relationship for some reason? I don't know, some people we just make characters and it works, others... it doesn't.. 


A lot of things I do are open ended, which means we always have options for a 'get out' if needs be, there are always things that can change or could go wrong... someone may react differently to how you expect. Maybe it depends on how much leeway you give your characters when you're posting as to whether that works... 


It's very much a case of what works for you...

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Find Another Way

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I don't do pre-plotted relationships period unless I'm very familiar with the other writer; and even then I'll only go for it if I know said writer is going to be fine if things fall to shit eventually. I've had too many bad experiences with people who take ships too personally, and I don't want to deal with their drama when one falls apart - for this very reason I don't even like to give an okay on the potential for a romantic relation unless I'm familiar with the other writer. 


Romantic plots can be fun, and a good relationship can really up the entertainment value of a roleplay; but they're generally not what I'm concerned with when I write. I've also never had a romantic relationship between characters that I'm not completely willing to absolutely destroy if an opportunity naturally arises. 


Simply put, there's a reason stories end at "Happily Ever After". 

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I'm all over the board. 


I'll preplot if its someone I know, usually with us rolling characters together. I'm quite content to just throw people together and see what sticks. It depends on if the player and I have a specific idea in mind that we want to try.


Couples adding a third to their relationships is always fun to do. I'm a sucker for arranged marriages, as I've said. Or relationships that are rather forced on one party or another. Where the other party has to earn their trust and affection. 


Currently, I've got a single dad I'm looking at pairing off. I think it could be a fun plot for someone more knowledgeable than him to try to help out. 

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Almost never. I've had it go wrong in the past, where a co-admin made a character specifically for mine, and my character was just NOPE. Said co-admin was very unimpressed, but even when I tried to force it, I couldn't get him to see her in the right way. 


Also, I've had characters turn around and decide they love someone else, or that they're just no longer interested anymore. Sometimes other things in the story change the character to a point where what used to make sense no longer does.


All of my in-character relationships are with the understanding that like real relationships, things might fall apart. They need to work on their relationship IC if it's gonna be "final".

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Do you plot relationships? How do you do it?


Yes, I do, in various ways. All by communicating with the writing partners. No relationship of mine would take place if not planned - it might be planned from the beginning or at a later moment when one of us has the revelation that the characters could be well together. (And even when I was seeking an unrequited love, I still asked for the other writer's consent, because I know that some writers get uncomfortable if not asked).


Do you plot characters as being Meant For Each Other, despite not having met before? Do you make characters specifically to end up with each other?


Yes, I do it. When they are meant for each other, and made specifically for the writing partner, the bios are made to resonate. Sometimes they would just fall in love. Sometimes they are already engaged or married when the story starts.


Do you prefer to play them off each other first before deciding?


Not necessarily. I can decide before making the character, if there is an understanding with the writing partner, or later, if I have a revelation at a certain point that they would be good together. 


Do you Decide, or do you just let the story take its course?


The story is written by me and by the writing partners. I don't believe in characters writing themselves and having their own will. It's the writers who build the story and the characters are just accomplishing their roles in the story.


Do you have relationships that aren't healthy or that aren't intended to be Forever?


Yes, I do. I had relationships which weren't intended to be forever (not in present doesn't mean that I will not again), and I have relationships which aren't healthy, but are appropriate for the specific characters and their times. For example, two characters are in a smothering love relationship, which one would call co-dependent now. But then it was all right, especially given the traumas both characters had been through. They needed each other, and it is normal for them to rely on each other. And in their own way, they are happy together, ultimately. A happiness they deserve.

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Only with people I know! Though the pre-established relationship was important for plotty reasons.


I've never made a character for a relationship that was not pre-established, but I'm not opposed to the idea.


I only do this with writers I know though, because of trust reasons and so I know if there's 'chemistry' between myself and the other writer. By chemistry I mean, enjoys writing the same sort of things. Enjoys each other's writing and characters. That sort of thing.

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I've never made a character specifically for a relationship, and I really don't plot relationships out. The one time I tried, the other player was a hot mess, changing how things shook out without any consideration how it was going to affect any of the relationships (romantic and platonic) that her character was involved in... Then she was utterly confused why no one wanted to write with her anymore.


I have two characters currently some degree of involved in relationships.


One seems to be paired with her soul mate, and the character she's involved with was all but created for her. Not entirely planned out, but the other player was creating his character when I threw mine at him, and there were sparks. Not sure how much writing I'll get out of it, because the player is hit and miss on reliability, but the characters are so perfect for each other.


The other, she's currently in that early stage of a relationship where she's getting a feel for her potential partner and the two of them are getting to know each other. The friend I'm writing that with is a good friend, though he and I get into stupidest arguments all the time (I just spent hours arguing with him about mobile emitters for holography characters for a plot I've been trying to bring to life for three years now), and I think with enough time, our characters should settle into a very satisfying relationship.


I am jealous of people who get to explore poly relationships. I have enough trouble finding reliable writing partners for relationships, let alone ones that are also open to poly.

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I think communication is massively important in romantic RP. It's a honeypot for problems and an in character relationship is not - this is something we have specific rules about in my group. But done properly, it's fine! It just terrifies me personally due to lots of bad experiences...


Overall I think relationships kind of need ot be plotted out to respect one another's boundaries.

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