Staffing How do you handle the "I need to post" crowd that never does?

[Rune 1,099]

I'm sure we've all encountered them. Those people that do nothing but talk about how they need to post, but never actually doing so. Needless to say, it gets old. Especially if it becomes a daily or hourly thing. 

 

"I need to post..." And then nothing. An hour later: "I need to do posts..."
"I should write."

"I should work on posts."

"I should get tags done."
"I need to do replies."

Over and over and over again. Without any posts getting done. Just the repeated "complaints."

 

How do you handle it? Do you get after them, do you ignore it? What is the limit? When do you break? What do you say when you do finally snap? Do you ban them? Ban the words? Filter it so you don't have to hear it anymore? Just ignore it and hope it goes away?

 

Of course, there's nothing wrong with them doing this. If they want to waste their own time, that's on them. It's the fact that it's annoying as hell that generally gets to people.

[FriedKilamari 46]

I've been that person sometimes. Usually it's because I've just come out of a depressive low and I'm trying to gear myself up to do posts. Other times it's because I know I need to do posts, but can't focus enough to do them.

 

So for me it's usually, "I need to do posts, but X." and more than likely is followed by an apology for taking so long to do it.

 

Other times it's "I need to do posts, but I'm working on site updates." I guess I use this as a way to tell my partners that I haven't forgotten about them, but I've got some other things going on that take my priorities first?

 

So far I haven't come across someone who says "I need to write." and then...doesn't actually write. I kinda feel like I'm the sort of person who, after reading that for the tenth time, would tell them that maybe they should actually write their posts instead of complain.

 

Only nicer.

[JByrd 33]

I reply with snarky comments that are juuuuust this side of being mean.  Post or don't.. but saying that you need to do posts does nothing but aggravate the heck out of me when I'M one of those waiting on a reply.

 

"I need to post"
me: Do, or not, but do not tell
"I should get replies done"
"Yes! [character's name] has been waiting for __ months"

"I have tags to do"

"Do the thing! don't tell us about it. just do it. "  

 

[Guest BETA BLUE]

Maybe I'm cynical but I just roll my eyes depending on the person. I know a few people that try when they make the statement and others just say for attention. I'm tired fo fluffing feathers to tempt people to post.

[Rune 1,099]

3 minutes ago, BETA BLUE said:

Maybe I'm cynical but I just roll my eyes depending on the person. I know a few people that try when they make the statement and others just say for attention. I'm tired fo fluffing feathers to tempt people to post.

That's pretty much what I do.

The first time, sure. I'll encourage you. The second, okay, maybe its just one of those days.

 

Third and fourth? Okay, now you just want a pity party. Shut up and post or go do something else.

[Uaithne 543]

This is one of the hardest things because it's not anyone else's responsibility to make or encourage people to post. It's not even something you CAN do even if you wanted to. I like helping solve problems where there are ways that an admin can help their members . . . This definitely isn't that sort of problem. XD

 

But of course it's a very real issue. I mostly ignore it. If it bothered me because someone kept saying it, I might PM them like, "Hey, dude, you keep saying this thing and I don't think I understand what you're meaning. How can I help you?"

[Shades 676]

Honestly, as a member and admin, I ignore it. I'd pull my hair out if I were to get upset every time a partner/member of a site I'm a member of keeps saying they need to post.

 

I do draw the line at those who keep promising posts (today) daily or every other day and then two weeks later, nope, nothing, nada. I do feel these need to be addressed. If they're busy, fine, put an away notice. Otherwise, just stop promising you'll post today and just tell people when  you have actually done something.

 

Note: all yous are general and all offensive comments are just partially on purpose.

[Kaaytastic 11]

I find that sometimes it's a bit of everything.

 

It's people wanting to post and not having the motivation themselves to do so (i've been there myself), sometimes it's about knowing you need to post and having X number of things to do before it that just makes you feel like you'll never get around to it. With those people I tend to be more understanding and supportive to the best of my ability but still recognizing that yeah I can't post for you. You need to sort you out.

 

And then sometimes it's just that one person who's looking for attention (and or like Rune said, doing a pity party routine) and has no plans of doing anything. Those are the people who I tend to ignore and just eventually weed out of the site during a check because they've literally done nothing in the last three weeks they've been 'complaining' about needing to post but never doing it.

[firefly 36]

 

Most of the time I give gentle encouragement (something like “that’s cool” or “you can do it!”) followed by changing the subject and ignoring. Sometimes, if it’s someone who is usually pretty on top of things, I’ll message the person and asked if they want to scrap what we were trying to write or take things in a different direction. I know that I can get blocked in a scene when I can’t figure out how I want to respond to a post, and talking through it can get the thread back on track.

 

I've had only one time where I snapped at someone and was like “dude, that thread is over a year old, and even if you did actually post this week, I’m not going to post back. Please let it go." They finally stopped talking about needing to post for me after that, lol.

[Kit the Human 758]

- If they're new and I don't know them well, I'd say something along the lines of: "I can't wait!"

- If they're typically speedy but seem to be struggling. I reach out to them and ask if everything is ok.

- If it's a boring habit they have everytime they have posts to reply to, I change the subject.

 

I did join a site a while a go that had this OOC community of "oh no, I was caught up for a hot second there", "I need to do posts but X", "I'm drowning in posts" and well, it rather confused me. Don't you want to write? Should I not reply to our thread because the aim is to be caught up, not to actually post? To this day, I'm confused by the vibe.

 

I think another way staff can combat that kind of community is to express excitement over receiving posts and having things to reply to. 

[musicdiva1331 34]

I have been on many sides of this situation, because it's really not that cut and dry. I've waited a million years for posts, and I've also been the one who felt like shit for making people wait.

 

Sometimes, I literally just have no idea how to respond. I feel blocked in, as mentioned by a few folks above, and I can't even figure out how to FORCE a post and I suck at breaking a ship or telling a person "hey, you've really put me in a weird spot here where I'm absolutely stumped". I know I've also done that to people. It makes me really super anxious because I've been flat out attacked for it, and then been raked over the coals for getting defensive while being called a moron, stupid, a c***, etc. Over RP and plots. Like, tried to say "hi, please I would like this conversation to end and because you're staff I can't block you without probably being banned and I want to rp with other people here, so please stop, thanks" and just messages on messages. That's one side. It made it really hard to post for them and so they'd ask and I would really try, and so i'd make many people wait because I like to post in order. So I'd switch to alphabetical through characters or whatever. That worked for a while. And I felt bad.

 

I also recognize that my mental illness affects my posting. If I'm in a depressive funk, sometimes my muse is great and I can post a ton because I can't get my feelings out any other way. Sometimes, I want to do nothing other than binge watch conspiracy theory documentaries and drink la croix. If I get super anxious I can't post. I over think everything. 

 

Then there's work. I work 40 hours a week at a homeless shelter. Mostly on a computer. Somedays I get time to post. Somedays everything is exploding and I'm lucky if I get to do my actual job between the crazy ass shit that is going on.

 

On the flip side, I will wait an eternity if I know you have rl stuff going on. I will be super understanding if I know you're dealing with mental health stuff too. I don't appreciate if I ask, like literally just say "hey, it's been a few months, just wanted to check if you still wanted to ______" if nothing has been said and you either a)don't say anything or b)blame me and freak the fuck out. like, chill , I just wanted to make sure, not pressure you. Or if I am like, hey, I'm losing muse, it's been like 6 months, I think I might do something else with character x, that is not like, a threat, it's just a heads up? Even if I get mad about it. I am one of those anger burns fast and then dissipates. 

 

idk, that's what I got.

[TurnABlindEyeEDDY 11]

I think it is dependent on the tone. Sometimes people just need a little encouragement/attention and I admit I'm a little bit of a coddler ... but there comes a point where you just ignore them. You give them zero attention about it. Acknowledge them with a hello in chat and than continue on with your conversations.

[Icewolf 258]

After a while, I just ignore it - you know that they aren't going to post. On social media type sites I just make a note not to bother rping with a particular person if all they do is "I should post but (insert what-ever here.)" all the time. Similarly,  I ignore people who don't post in their accounts very often, but when they do show up, they make the same complaint every time. At one point, I did give them several chances, but I realized that most of the problems they had in getting and retaining rp partners was that they ignored people if they didn't want to do romance, so it was just best to not bother with them in the end. There was a time when I was very active and gradually, I needed a break from things so I dropped it off. I think that surprised some people because they were used to be being a regular poster, but there comes a time when everyone needs a break (and should.) If I'm on a site and I'm in that situation, I leave and let the admin and staff know so that they aren't waiting for posts that won't come.

 

I'm not sure if pressuring someone to write will work though. From my own experience of it (activity checks, people sending me prompts to post, etc), all it will do is make me dig my heals in and not post. If I don't feel like posting, then that extra pressure will usually make me back out entirely, so I think people need to admit to themselves that it's not working for them and leave the site if they are holding on to canons that other people want to take up. The cycle of people saying they should post but don't post also feeds off each other, as well - if staff don't post for long periods of time, then members will gradually drop off because it doesn't appear like the staff are interested in the site any more (and you get the feeling that they just hang on to things because they are staff.) It's not so much a problem when an ordinary member does it, but when it becomes a common culture among the staff it affects the mood of the site quite badly.

 

As for coming back to a site when that cycle of not feeling like posting is over - I'll probably go back to a social media type setting but for a forum based site, I'd be less likely to. I think I'd have to really love the forum based site to go back to it.

[Sadrienne 242]

Depends on the person, and whether I'm the person waiting on a response. For the most part, I trust my members to talk to each other OOC enough that they know what's going on/why someone may be struggling to post.

 

If it's someone I'm waiting for a post from, I'll talk to them privately and ask if there's anything I can do that will make it easier -- suggest ideas, or ways to close the thread out if it's that problematic.

 

When I say that old phrase (and I do a fair bit), it's usually more a vent of self-exasperation. I know that I need to post, but I am (for whatever reason) lacking in the spoons to do it. I want to post and am frustrated by the inability, and I understand that others are equally exasperated by my lack of reply. As has been said above, it's kind of a way to let people know that you haven't forgotten them, you know you need to get  on top of it, you want to get on top of it, but for x reasons it may not happen today.

 

But when we're talking people who say the same for months on end, and never post -- once I've offered help, I'll ignore it. I'll give a "that sucks" and be done. I care that you're struggling, but if there's nothing I can do that will help the situation, then... that's kinda that. I have nothing more to offer.

[Zahhy 130]

We have a very sophisticated method for dealing with these folks. 

 

We ignore them.

 

Okay - I'll admit that perhaps it isn't the BEST way to go about something like this, but there's a difference between saying "Oh shoot y'all I'm sorry, last week got away from me I could really use a post." and the person you are describing. At first, I might not notice that this person is going to become a serial complainer, so maybe I encourage them once or twice, try to plot with them. (I am the admin after all).

 

Usually what happens is we eventually realize what kind of person is going to follow through and which won't. Maybe if we kept encouraging that person would eventually play - but for some reason, we just don't think it is worth the effort so we ignore 95% of comments that have to do with complaining about NOT playing.