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Admin style: Has it changed?


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Hey guys, 

 

I was wondering if anyone had any  thoughts on how their admin style has changed over the years? 

What would you like to get back to?

What would you like to avoid from the past? 

 
 
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I was wondering if anyone had any  thoughts on how their admin style has changed over the years? 

 

Oh boy. For the better, that much is certain. I recently found an old (about ten years) version of the rules from Tally, and it made me feel actual sick. There was everything I hate in there, down to the "find the keywords and submit in your application so we know you read them". There was so much in them that I no longer feel a need to police, and I definitely trust my members to make good decisions now. It's way easier to just nudge people in the right direction if they're getting off course than it is to try and block every potential issue from the start.

 

I've definitely become more relaxed, less controlling, and learned to take proper ownership of the board and make it what I want it to be (as opposed to what other people tell me it should be).

 

What would you like to get back to?

 

Having oodles of time to pour into board development and postee? Aha I think that's legitimately it. When I first opened Tally I was an Arts student with no job. Now I'm an adult person, who has to pay rent. I can't be up until 4am anymore, or skip class to finish replying to threads. That does make me a bit sad. It's also why I'm not as heavily involved in the external RP community as I was back then too, which I do very much miss.

 

I mean, I'd like to get back to the Mousie that was? Sort of faded from memory while I was off the scene, and not having that time to put into as many documentations and resources as I'd like, that bit sucks. Being an adult is the worst.

 

What would you like to avoid from the past? 

 

Oooh I definitely want to avoid the bit where I got walked over by my staff, and where I let my ex-best friend stay in the community an entire year after our very ugly falling out. I moved 1500km to get away from her IRL but couldn't bring myself to exclude her from my site. I learned a lot of hard lessons about giving too many chances, and sticking to what I needed Tally to be. 

 

And the part where I let myself believe that my members were angry with me, and that I'd let them down. That was dumb.

 

But mostly, it all comes back to avoiding stress. When things got stressful, I let them stay that way. There's so much I could have avoided if I'd acknowledged there was a problem and dealt with it from the start. I let things grow instead, and ended up with stomach aches and fainting-level panic attacks. No fun.

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Nice question.

 

I definitely have changed and become a better admin.  I don't want to go back to the admin I was.  After years of hard work and trial-and-error, I am more relaxed and better able to stand up for myself (and my members) than I used to be.  It's not like I was a horrible person, at least not intentionally; I just said a lot of the wrong stuff without realizing the effect it had on people.

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I care so much less.

 

In a good way. I've relaxed. I let people do their thing and just step in when I absolutely have to. 

 

I'd like to get back into genres I've adminned in the past but no way in hell do I want to be as controlling as I was.

 

 

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I'm going to unsurprisingly voice a lot of what has already been said. I won't' say I "care less" because that definitely doesn't feel accurate, but my focus has completely changed. 

 

I used to care a lot about what people thought of me and about how I should act and about pleasing everyone. I learned that pleasing everyone is impossible and that nobody has to like me to play games with me, or to like me to ignore me and still play games with my players.

 

Instead of caring a whole lot about what is going on around me, I focus on being the type of player I would want in a game. I put my admin responsibilities before my writing, but I still write actively. I treat my players all the same, and I also treat them as if they are instant friends.

 

I no longer lose myself over bullying, or even someone threatening me or the game. I've made too many mistakes trying to right the wrongs a loud player complained about at the expense of myself and other players. NO MORE.

 

Instead, I take the time to measure both sides and test if the person's complaints are actually worthwhile to fix. We can't and shouldn't "fix" everything as admin, we would kill ourselves trying!

 

I used to try to be everywhere at once. To reach out to all of my players and ask them how they are doing, I used to be the first to ask what they want to thread. Now I realize, some people just don't like me, some people aren't interested in the threads I like to write.

 

Instead of forcing myself onto all of my players, I just try to maintain a fun chat community and keep a safe and fair space on the forum. I follow my own rules but I also adapt and let the game grow as the players change. I play with the people that reach out to me, that reply to my messages. If someone isn't interested in me, I don't force it, I don't try to change to please that one person anymore.

 

I also used to be a major stickler for sticking to canon and site lore and stopping people from breaking the rules. Too many people don't read or don't care for me to waste my energy.

 

Instead I just sort of let everything go if it doesn't affect me, doesn't break the game and isn't in a major thread. 

Edited by Zahhy
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I don't know if there were any staffing trends, all I know is that every single board that I staffed at for the past 7 or so years had different methods. One site split everyone's duties apart (advertising mod, coding mod, event mod, etc.), one site had it so everyone - admin or mod - had the same duties but admins were the ones who would discuss things like recruiting new mods or firing current mods amongst themselves, and another that was run kind of like a council aiding the figurehead (whose word was final rather than things be diplomatic), et cetera. Some sites require more staff involvement (mod run events, dungeons, threads), while some require less staff involvement. I think I still see a little bit of all of those "staffing styles" today. It just depends on the board and genre.

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21 hours ago, dusk said:

I was wondering if anyone had any  thoughts on how their admin style has changed over the years? 

 

So I found some PMs I wrote as an admin a good 10 years ago. Maybe more. And wow. I was a giant asshole. So I would say I have found much better ways to communicate. I also don't treat RP and adminning as life or death Super Cereal Oh Em Gee as I used to. I no longer ask members to fix grammatical or spelling mistakes in their apps. And I no longer fly off the handle when someone advertises in the wrong forum.

 

I must have mellowed in my old age. 

 

What would you like to get back to?

 

None of it. I am fine with the admin I am now. And I think it suits the site I run a lot better than my previous incarnations.

 

What would you like to avoid from the past? 

 

Being a judgmental elitist asshole, for one. You write what makes you happy, and I'll write what makes me happy. The only time I will step in is when you are breaking the rules. Makes for a much better experience all around.

 

I also have taken a lot of stress off myself. I used to think I had to play with everyone all the time always equally. It was really exhausting. Now I play when and where I want, while still helping members with plots and getting started where I can. Because this is also my have fun hobby. And I'd like to have fun doing it rather than stressing about all the things all the time.

 

 

This ^

 

I had so many things to say but this flat out sums me up too.

 

I think one thing though I would have changed about the past would be to not be so worried all the time. I was always stressing about upsetting friends who wanted everyone to pay attention to their SLs. I think I would have for sure not trusted so blindly, though I still do that.

 

And over all? I would not have made it my job. Like my first admin life was 100% the board and this time around? Eh, I'll get to it when I get to it, I've got fun threads to write!

 

One thing that I can say that I have not changed is that I have always stood in my truth. I have been spoken about, written about, and called every name in the book but one thing as admin/player/person that I have never ever ever done is fire back.

 

I'll say something snarky here or there, but I've been called horrid things and spoken about at length (still) and simply weathered through it. I'm a strong person, I've got good values and morals, and being an admin the first round made me forget those, but anyone who has ever had a fight with me over the net can not and will not ever have a log or thread where I have fired back when they took shots. 

 

Its not my jam.

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My adminning/staffing style has definitely changed. I adminned a few sites and staffed other people's sites (something I'm never doing again), and things I have learned with and changed:

 

1.  If I'm not having fun,it's not worth it. I was so crazy about making my site welcoming to others, not me, or pleasing others that I was miserable. Nowadays, if it's miserable, I'll change things up or close up shop if it can't be changed.

 

2. I've learned I have to make the site I want in all aspects, because there's never a guarantee that other people will join, so I have to like it, since I'll be the one looking at the site daily.

 

3. Staff discretion. It took me a long time to include that on my sites. I spent a long time being miserable because 'John Doe is making the site uncomfortable, but he's not breaking any written rules, so I can't ban him'. Fuck that, I can ban people because they have pink hair if I choose to. (As long as their pink hair creates a disturbance).

 

I still need to learn 100% that I'm not responsible for anyone's mental health, and that my site is not their lifeline, but I'm getting there. And no, I would not go back to the admin I once was. I have relaxed on a lot of things, and learned to stand firmly on others, and I have only grown as an admin at this point.

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I think I've always been a relaxed and lazy ass admin, tbh. I've always disliked applications and app processes. When I had them, I always had mods or co-admins do that because meh. I'm not altogether worried about people coming in and breaking setting or whatever. Play what you want within reason. I've almost never had issue with people just playing what they want in a sandbox style world. I've always liked events but I don't like making them forced, so people know that shit is going down in the world but they don't have to participate if they don't want to. 

 

I have changed in the fact that I'm less concerned about how I appear to others. I used to force myself to post even when I wasn't feeling something. I used to worry about making every person want to join and I catered WAY too much to what guests who weren't even a part of the board wanted. Now I'm just like "This is us, if you don't like us, don't join." 

 

I definitely don't want to go back to that. I'm fine with how things have gone. 

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I was an asshole as I saw posts and logs from 2010-2011, and feel like I am nicer now than ever before. I am less likely to stand for people's bullshit though and will ban drama and people trolling/harassing on sight. No tolerance or time to deal with that kinda crud.

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  • 3 weeks later...

I would definitely say that my admin style has changed. I have been an admin on 6 sites over the course of 10 years of roleplaying. And I have definitely learned things I shouldn't have done way back when. 

 

I would have to say that the only thing I would like to get back to, was the fun side of roleplay. Even as an admin, I can have my fun. The site isn't going to go up in flames if I don't link back immediately. I've become more of a maintenance man so to speak.

 

As for what I'd avoid, it would be allowing my personal feelings get in the way. The last time I was an admin on a successful site, I had allowed my emotions to get in the way at times. I was 16, but that is still no excuse. I hope that I don't have an issue with that now, but I know to look out for it now. It's also extremely helpful that the site I'm an admin on now, was started by myself and two other friends, instead of being a solo mission. I can get feedback without leading on other members about problems with the site.

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  • 2 months later...

I consider myself more patient than your average bear, but was more patient when I was younger. This was no doubt at least partially due to time, and the fact that I had a lot more of it and so could get down to the nitty gritty whenever needed. Another part was that the site was much smaller and so the demands on my time were more reasonable and easier to manage. Another part was a lack of exposure to certain behavior. Things that may have just weird, anomalous behavior soon became yellow or red flags for me to keep an eye on and pretty often thing turn out the way I expect them to in those cases, for better or worse

 

I think for how everything has changed, in how much time I have and the demands on my time and the experience and insight that now feed my administration style, I wouldn't change it. I do try to be mindful of people and their situations and the fact that I can't know or understand everything all the time, but I've realized that people will flip out in a major way over minor things and the onus isn't on you to match their energy levels

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How has your admin style changed over the years?

 

Looking back I micro-managed way too much and too strict with the rules. Even had that ‘prove you read the rules’ line hidden away which looking back was pretty dumb, given that ctrl f is a thing. These days I treat players like the adults they are and give more leeway. I still enforce rules that matter to me but I’m not as hung up on stuff like matching posts or words counts or having a ton of rules to follow.

 

I try to be more mindful of my words and the way my tone could be read. Not saying I always succeed but I can see an improvement over the years. When I’m feeling stressed, annoyed, or frustrated I make myself sign off and take a break from replying to messages from players. Before I would have pushed through because I felt I ‘had’ to reply right away or they’d think I was ignoring them. Now I know it’s better to wait till I’m calmer and that not everything has to be done asap.

 

On that train of thought I’m also not as hard on myself about being online and available to the members 24/7. I use to stress myself out over missing people’s messages or taking a few hours to a day to reply which amuses me now because I had so much time to be online back then. Now that I have even less I’ve come to accept that I do have limitations and I don’t have to be available at all times.

 

What would you like to get back to?

 

Having more time? Wishful thinking sadly as I don’t think I’ll ever have free time like that again until I’m retired lol. Indulging in character extras more and making graphics would be nice. Signatures have seemed to fallen out of favor in games but I use to enjoy making little banners and icons for characters I loved, my own and others so it would be fun to get back into that aspect but…again, with what time?

 

What would you like to avoid from the past?

 

Letting my emotions get the better of me and stressing myself out to the point where rp stops being fun. Making maps, I never liked making maps but in some genres/games they are necessary so not sure if I can avoid it forever.

Edited by saltwaterwitch


 

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