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The Excuses Don't Stop


Hypester
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So, there are members that don't post sometimes, right? And you/we have a whole LOA system and are really flexible and we understand, real life is real, and sometimes you just cannot because of stress from real life.

 

But then there are some members who seem to rarely post, even though they may chat, and writing partners are waiting on them for weeks at a time. When you reach out to them they seem to always have a different illness or be moving or have a death in the family or have connection problems or something...

 

Now, it's not so much about whether I should believe this person or not, after all, who am I to say their life isn't totally forked. My question is more about how you guys might handle members like this. Does it matter if they have an important character or not? Does it matter if they make activity check all in one day? Am I just wigging out over nothing?

 

Your thoughts, please.

Edited by Hypester
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I personally try to always assume that whatever reason they're giving me is true, mostly for my peace of mind. (At least externally and for the sake of what I'll do with them and their characters) But that doesn't mean they're not held to the same standards as everyone else. 

 

For important characters who need to be in play, I set up a hard limit (something like: miss x checks in a row for whatever reason, and you'll lose the character). For characters who aren't central to the plot, I often keep them safe as long as the member has a LOA on at the moment of the activity check.

 

It spares me the work of arguing whether or not the member's stated reasons are valid, and just focus on the course of action I need to take. If it becomes a pattern (take up important characters, don't post, lose them, rinse and repeat), I may even ban those members from taking up plot-central characters until they become reliable with other less important characters, but I don't really bother with the whys, just the hows. I used to worry a lot about the whys and that only left me with a lot of important characters sitting there and not being played when they were needed, so now I do my best to keep the roleplay running as well as be respectful of the fact that some people do have harder and busier lives, but still want to have a place in the roleplay.

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Shady McShaderson

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I've dealt with this in the past and tbh it can be frustrating, especially when important characters or characters that have loads of plots going with current members are involved. If you know you're not going to have time to roleplay for an indefinite period, just be reasonable and drop that canon character so the site plot doesn't stagnate for everyone else!! Like a lot of people, I don't like strict activity rules either but there is a limit. The site was made for roleplaying and if it takes weeks & weeks for people to reply and the slow pace is affecting everyone else's plots, then, no. Sorry. I'm not as fussed about the activity of minor characters.

 

Last time I had someone put up a leave of absence that was meant to last two weeks, but kept being prolonged and prolonged with more and more excuses, I just straight up told them sorry, but I'm going to have to give the canon character to someone else because it isn't fair on the other roleplayers who are waiting around for their plots to advance.

 

 

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for these types of players, I get used to expecting them to not post. We'll I know that may sound mean but if I get used to their lack of participation, I won't approach them about heavy roles in my plots. I'll find another player when I need someone involved in a life-changing or long term plot with my own.

As for canon roles, that's the only time I need to do anything about them as staff. I'd just have to let them know, "you can keep the character, but they're being demoted from this role so that someone else can fill it. You can be reconsidered for these types of roles once you start being consistently active on the site."

 

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I believe them. I mean, shit, this year so far has been crazy for me! xD My job was keeping me super busy, had some health stuff (including getting the super bad flu that was killing lotsa people here--that knocked me on my ass for a few weeks alone!), I moved, I had Comic-Con and friends visiting, got married and more friends visiting...! It was a lot! So it totally sounds like excuse after excuse but, well, real life can totally be that chaotic. And it's not that I don't have time to post, it's that by the time I do have time to post, I'm so exhausted I just want to veg out.

 

So, I believe them.

 

But it's up to them to keep me up to date.

 

If they miss the checks, it's on them, and they get the same treatment. If they keep me informed, though, then I will wait for them.

 

I also don't create situations in my games where any character is so important that without them, things won't progress. Doesn't matter if the character is a king, we have contingency plans, like hand-waving things and saying the character is currently indisposed for ~mysterious reasons~ and so another character is stepping in to temporarily rule in their stead. Bam. Done.

 

That works for my games. It won't necessarily work for every game. But it's worked well for us. 8D

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I try to be understanding. Real life happens and sometimes things go completely wrong for extended periods of time. And that's what LOAs are for, and most of the time people can work around your absence if you're not writing a character that's only got a minor presence on the site. I personally don't care much if people keep doing this if I'm a member because I'll just refuse to write with you and find members that can give me activity. No harm no foul, you're just not the right partner for me and hopefully you find someone willing to write with you. 

 

But on boards I run, you have two options. A staff member can NPC your character for important threads such as sitewide plots and leadership decisions, or you can drop the character. No single player has the right to hold up an entire board. If the character is still open by the time you come back, then you're welcome to take them again! But if someone who's actually active has shown interest in playing them, I'm not going to prioritise someone who posts once every three months. The good of the site comes before your feelings and problems, harsh as it may sound. 

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LOAs for whatever reason can be a drag on plots, but when that happens I always encourage my members to branch out. If one person's activity is holding up your entire character then that's your problem for writing yourself into a corner. In real life, no one person is held up by another person's actions, or non-actions. Life moves on around them. @Viscount Rhi-Rhi and @CovertSphinx already put it really nicely. But it just comes down to play with who you've got and make it work. I'm not about to be someone's mom and demand something of them. At the end of the day, I don't really care about your activity - I got other shit to do.

 

That said, I've never run a fandom site with actual canons on which the story is dependent. Obviously those kinds of sites have different needs. In that case, just make your activity rules clear on what they are and who they affect. And don't be afraid to take action on them if you have to. 

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a dark, urban fantasy;

inspired by sailor moon

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7 hours ago, Sage said:

LOAs for whatever reason can be a drag on plots, but when that happens I always encourage my members to branch out. If one person's activity is holding up your entire character then that's your problem for writing yourself into a corner. In real life, no one person is held up by another person's actions, or non-actions. Life moves on around them. @Viscount Rhi-Rhi and @CovertSphinx already put it really nicely. But it just comes down to play with who you've got and make it work. I'm not about to be someone's mom and demand something of them. At the end of the day, I don't really care about your activity - I got other shit to do.

 

That said, I've never run a fandom site with actual canons on which the story is dependent. Obviously those kinds of sites have different needs. In that case, just make your activity rules clear on what they are and who they affect. And don't be afraid to take action on them if you have to. 

 

This, and I agree also with the two others mentioned in the post. Not always one can succeed not to make a plot dependent of a certain leader's orders or actions, but with slightly NPC-ing them at duty, the problem can be solved. This was the solution I have always used.

 

As for what others suggest, taking the character from them, it happens only when the writer of a character of utmost importance actually vanish for 6+ months. (Or if he says he is leaving and he wants the character up for adoption). Otherwise, we are trying to find an alternative solution, because taking the character away doesn't mean necessarily that someone else wants him, and we've got another character up to adoption that nobody is interested into and I have to write for in order to have the story go on.

 

...Now, lately I am exactly THAT PERSON. I don't have a LOA, I have just a "slow post notice". What's happening to me in the latest 4-5 months is nothing like the people who have always written with me know me as. I have become a slow poster, because I can't do anything more. I am overwhelmed. I wish I were on a desert island,to be able to gather my thoughts, to think properly, to plot and to write. Not to have phone ringing and daily obligations.

 

People are understanding and wait. They know that if needed, they can NPC my characters around; I am not possessive, for me the story counts first. I am trying my best. It's just that lately... my best is not enough.

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Really appreciate your comments guys!

 

I really like the idea of contingency plans and the acknowledgement that that balance is a little more interesting on fandom sites. I think more than a position it's the canon relationships that are most missed when a player has continuous limited posting bouts. Certainly they can be replaced. Robin can work for Superman. Belle can date Alladin. And it doesn't have to be that drastic, but the actual loss to a chronic slow poster is given connections of an actual fandom, and appreciating that due to the nature of RP boards you can't/won't get things 'just so' in your canon, regardless of how common it may be in any other adaptation. So that's an important realization for me.

 

The other thing that stood out to me is that counting on the player's understanding is also a legitimate option. They know they're slow, and they likely would be/are flexible to NPCing headcannoning and things like that. They don't *have* to play everything out themselves to get the character where they "should" be.

 

So yeah, great notes guys, I appreciate y'all. And special thank you to @Elena for being vulnerable.

Edited by Hypester
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