Roleplay Bias dealing with a member

[VirusZero 176]

Truth be told, it's been almost a month since they messaged me and I haven't replied back or taken any action. This has partly been because of the holidays (I mean end of December is pretty busy) and my work schedule. Though it has also been because, frankly, I know that it wouldn't matter if I waited because they wouldn't log on to read (let alone respond to) any reply instantly anyway. 

 

I've got and idea for one last PM I'm going to send but then I'll be following CovertSphinx's answer and dropping the ban hammer. 

 

As for that note on activity... Thanks for the offer CovertSphinx. I won't use the exact wording but it's given me some ideas for things to write of my own. I've just quickly jotted them down for now so I need to flesh them out properly... but having something like this is a good idea. So thank you very much for it. I appreciate you sharing that with us.

[Joey 0]

It's never simple, you try to monitor things and it can snap back at you.

Making sure you treat people fairly is also difficult, especially when you encounter differences between two people. It awkward, yet usually for me, things remain plain sailing. However recently I have seen two members of my site constantly argue and bicker, it's gotten to the point one has decided to leave and then the other threw in the towel. I being me, tried to get them both to settle down and tried to put things into perspective.

That lead to one assuming I had taken sides, despite the fact I hadn't.

Morale of the story, no matter how much you try - it's not always good to get involved at the off. If you can get a team member to step in, this can be a good option as you can get involved after.

[Honorem 219]

On Monday, 18 January 2016 at 8:45 AM, CovertSphinx said:

We (staff) do not make a place "active". "Active" comes from YOU, who pop on and take the reigns of your own play rather than sitting around and waiting for somebody else to do it for you. Active comes from when your thread is moving a little slow you go get involved in something new. You throw us ideas for events, you jump into and start random threads in places. Active comes from if your character is just 'not feeling it', switch to a new style. Active comes from following through on what you start. Don't launch an NPC assault on a city if you can't BE the NPCs and see the attack through. Activity comes from, when you're "low on muse", instead of just disappearing tell the others in the thread to go on without you this way THEIR thread-muse doesn't die as well. When you fail to be communicative and just stop posting in a thread, you kill the site not only for yourself, but your thread-mates as well. You chase OTHERS away from the site along with you. If you're going to decide this isn't the place for you, please be respectful and not kill it for everyone else by letting them expect you to come back and finish your turn. Tell us goodbye and move on, don't drag us through the kill zone with you.

A million likes, I agree completely. Too often people assume a site's inactivity is the staff's problem. That is almost always not the case. If you have lazy members who won't put in the effort and expect everything to fall into their lap, then it just becomes a huge cesspool of inactivity, through no fault of those trying to run the forum. I've been there in the past; no matter what you do, you just can't get some members to post.

[CovertSphinx 710]

15 hours ago, Joey said:

Making sure you treat people fairly is also difficult, especially when you encounter differences between two people. It awkward, yet usually for me, things remain plain sailing. However recently I have seen two members of my site constantly argue and bicker, it's gotten to the point one has decided to leave and then the other threw in the towel. I being me, tried to get them both to settle down and tried to put things into perspective.

That lead to one assuming I had taken sides, despite the fact I hadn't.

Morale of the story, no matter how much you try - it's not always good to get involved at the off. If you can get a team member to step in, this can be a good option as you can get involved after.

 

I had a similar problem one time as well. Two of the ladies, who were long-standing members and both close friends with the Member Behavior Mod and other Admin, began to bully a gentlemen on our RP who's first language was definitely not english. We've had minor cultural barrier issues previously with him but for the most part things were pretty tolerable. Long story short, issues (that another staff thought they were able to Peer-Resolve through PMs) escalated to where these two ladies were abusing the Karma system to downvote him, then stupidly bragging about it in the C-box using a "code language" for the topic as if it wasn't obvious what they were actually saying. Mind you, these are two ladies who previously 'came out' with their own stories of being victims of bullying - which is what pissed me off royally when I happened to have been online and watched this happening in front of my very eyes.

 

I conferred in private with the other two mods briefly, but the task of speaking came down to me because I was the most "neutral" of the staff members, as they didn't want to be accused of betraying friendship and making a bigger mess.  Both Ladies got verbally chewed out for bullying - in front of everyone this time because I don't play games when I have to step in as authority - and I admittedly got nasty: pointed out the one's complaints of being bullied because of her weight and the other one's admitted issues with depression, that at supposedly 17/18 years old they should both know better having BEEN where their victim is emotionally. They got told either they knock it the F*k off and start acting like adults or they were getting perma-banned. Both left on their own within two months. And avoided me on the site up until that point.

 

....I'm only realizing now that I'm apparently the "scary staff" that you don't want to have to hear from XD

[Morrigan 1,826]

58 minutes ago, CovertSphinx said:

....I'm only realizing now that I'm apparently the "scary staff" that you don't want to have to hear from XD

 

I thought that was me. Then I found out everyone PMs me. >_>

[VirusZero 176]

CovertSphinx, 

Classic crybully behaviour right there. Unfortunately this has become all too common as of late, especially within the roleplay community (which often imports things from tumblr... and that's where a large amount of this type of behaviour originates). And once this behaviour starts it can quite quickly and easily kill a site.

 

If you haven't heard the term "Crybully" before...

Spoiler

what it means is someone who is both the aggressor and purported victim at the same time. They're the sort who love insulting others but the second it's their turn for criticism or whatever they cry that they're being oppressed or silenced or bullied. They also often claim they have some sort of trauma too. Though some caution should be exercised when putting stock in their claims because in many cases they find disagreeing with them tantamount to rape. Meaning any claims they make are subject to gross over-exaggeration. 

 

 

 

[Honorem 219]

On Friday, 22 January 2016 at 8:10 AM, VirusZero said:

CovertSphinx,

Classic crybully behaviour right there. Unfortunately this has become all too common as of late, especially within the roleplay community (which often imports things from tumblr... and that's where a large amount of this type of behaviour originates). And once this behaviour starts it can quite quickly and easily kill a site.

Yeah, I've dealt with these types before. They are particularly a victim when it comes to laying down the law on them when they've done something wrong. They don't like that one bit and will try to demonize the staff for doing their job. And also introduce elements to their argument which have nothing to do with the matter at hand.

'You can't say your character invented every piece of technology for the past two-hundred years'

'But roleplay sites are about creativity, you're stopping my creativity!'

'Integrity of the setting is above all. Be creative, but within reason and within the established setting'

'You are a control freak'

 

That kind of crap. Lol.

[CovertSphinx 710]

Admittedly this was my first encounter with the term. Ironically enough, now that the two of you mentioned it..... They did have issues with creating certain types of characters that fit the mode to a T..... I credit 3-4 Character Creation Rules we had to implement SPECIFICALLY to the one chick.

 

And now I have a severe distaste for deities. Severe. Distaste. Anybody who THINKS they're applying for a character of that power level on any board I staff goes through a profile screening process that makes the NCIC look like the TSA.

[Lusitano 0]

When I run into problems with people on my boards, and others' boards and when that happens I have a habit of implementing rules directed at those people specifically on every board I have. It tends to make my rules look like a novel.

 

Like, my newest wolf role play had a fairly lengthy rule about how wolves CANNOT CLIMB TREES, because in my last wolf rpg, I had one single member who must have confused her wolf with a jaguar. Then I realized just how stupid that was and deleted it

Edited January 27, 2016 by Diana